- "Faded starlets, troubled celebutantes and aggressive, costumed street performers - you never know who you're going to bump into on Vinewood Boulevard. Come see the sights and sounds for yourself, or jump aboard the Vinewood Star Tours bus to have a struggling actor narrate as you take a guided tour of the landmarks and homes of the rich and famous while sitting on an un-airconditioned bus."
- ―GTA V official website.
Vinewood Star Tours is a company running guided bus tours of famous Vinewood locations in Grand Theft Auto V.
Vinewood Star Tours gives the player tours around celebrity homes and some landmarks around Vinewood and Richman using a Tour Bus, which according to the Grand Theft Auto V website, has no air-conditioning. Tours cost $40.
Starting a tour is available from outside Vinewood Wax Haven on Vinewood Boulevard next to Up-n-Atom Burger between 7 am and 7 pm daily. Approaching the start point between 7 pm and 8 pm or between 6 am and 7 am may result in the player seeing the bus drive off and the guide announcing that the tours have closed for the day. Depending on traffic and traffic lights encountered, tours can take up to ten in-game hours. Tours started later in the day can therefore continue late into the night.
If the player calls the 1-999-VIN-TOUR as advertised on the back of the bus, some music will play until the player ends the call.
She often advises passengers to take out their cameras and smartphones to take photos of landmarks, even though a "no pictures" sign is visible inside the bus cabin, although she does explain the "no smoking" policy, but allows exceptions for medicinal marijuana.
The player always takes a seat directly behind the walled-off driver compartment. Unfortunately, this results in a very limited view with the first person camera option (or with Snapmatic).
The player can use a version of Trip Skip during the tour to jump to the next key destination and can exit the tour at any time.
The tour bus originally advertised "12 amazing ports of call" and this was increased to 20 in the Enhanced Version although the tour camera only focuses on the same 13 attractions in both versions.
|Start||Vinewood Boulevard||"As I'm contractually obliged to say... buckle up, everyone, it's showtime! Vinewood is often referred to as the anal bleaching capital of the world."|
|01||Gentry Manor Hotel||"On your right, you'll see the world famous Gentry Manor Hotel. A legendary party hangout for actors and rockstars and... people trying to have sex with actors and rockstars. Built in 1921, it's been the scene of some classic Vinewood scandals over the years. One of my personal favorites was Al Di Napoli's overdose in 2002, after a chimpanzee blasted an 8-ball up his rear door with a water pistol. Fantastic! They say that on any given day, there are at least two dead party girls in the trash cans round back. Isn't that great?"|
|02||The Dungeon Crawler||"Okay, smartphones at the ready, celeb-spotters, we are now approaching the legendary nightclub, The Dungeon Crawler. Opened in 1996, the club is famously owned by actor Bruce Spade, who has a custom-built elevated VIP table so that he looks the same height as everyone else. It remains one of Vinewood's hottest nightspots for the rich and famous to do drugs and date-rape impressionable fans. Play your cards right and that could be you! The Dungeon Crawler was in the news again recently when comedian Morgan Chester allegedly ran over a doorman in his SUV for not laughing at one of his jokes"|
|03||Tequi-la-la||"Oh, and now a treat for you closet glam rockers on board. We're coming up to the infamous Tequi-La-La rock bar. Back in the day, this was a restaurant run by the mob... until it got shut down over the 'Adam's Apple in the soup' controversy of 1982. It reopened as the Tequi-la-la in 1983, and soon became a mecca for hair metal bands and fans from across the country. It's rumored that the Love Fist song 'Dangerous Bastards' was written about a night they partied here on mescaline with some transgenders twins."|
|04||Mark Fostenburg's house||"Now, this house up ahead is one of the many private residences of action movie director Mark Fostenburg. Fostenburg still maintains he was out of town when a fifteen years old Mexican girl was found dead in his pizza oven in 2007. The case was settled out of court and all charges were dropped. The girl's family now live on the next street."|
|05||The Craze's house||"So, this is the house of television exercise guru The Craze. You might have seem him degrading himself recently on Rehab Island. Do any of you remember the eighties? Strange times. People didn't go to the gym back then. They did jumping jacks in front of the TV in legwarmers and headbands. The Craze swapped his gold lamé leotard for a crack pipe in the nineties, but he is reportedly now 'clean, and in the best shape of his life.' That's Vinewood code for, 'he's trying to make a comeback.'"|
|06||Martha Term's house||"This is the home of celebrity wild child Martha Term. Daughter of seventies comedy star Joanie Term, Martha spent her teens partying on booze, her early twenties partying on coke, and her mid twenties staring at her shoes on heroin. Her tell-all autobiography about the difficulties of growing up really rich in Vinewood only sold thirty copies last year."|
|07||The Richman Hotel||"Just up ahead is another place to see and be seen in Rockford Hills - the Richman Hotel. An iconic entertainment industry hangout, sleazy producer types have been promising to make young girls stars here for over a hundred years now. Not gonna lie... I did some shameful things in that lobby bar in my youth, but I've put that period of my life behind me now."|
|08||Weazel Morningwood*||"Here you can see the landmark Weazel Theater, which was opened here in Morningwood in 1930. Some of the biggest movies in history have premiered at this theater, including Blue Blood, The Shoulder of Orion and The Many Wives of Alfredo Smith. You might remember the controversial premiere of the gladiator comedy Lions & Donkeys in 1984, when star Chip Hampton walked up the red carpet with two slaves in chains."|
|09||Richards Majestic Productions||"And now to our left, ladies and gentlemen, is the famous Richards Majestic Studios. The product placement for classics like Nelson in Naples, and Rum Runner, and the not-so-classics like Vinewood Zombie, and The Shoulder of Orion II, was shoe-horned into the final edits right behind those very gates. Everyone has a favorite Solomon Richards movie. An American Divorce really helped me through a difficult time when I was bankrupting my first husband. Oh come on, don't people in the Midwest watch movies? You must have seem Defender of the Faith. No? Wow, tough crowd."|
|10**||Variable||"Just up ahead on the right is where Delancy Medua's septum fell out after a ketamine party."|
|11||Portola Drive||"Okay people, get those cameras out - this is Portola Drive. You won't get a better chance to spot a celebrity in its natural habitat. As you can see, the recession hasn't hit this part of the town very hard. These are some of the most offensively high-end designer stores in the country. And now, some fun trivia for you; there have been a number of movies shot on Portola Drive. Mostly awful ones about rich idiots. Including the blockbuster 2005 romantic comedy Shoe Whore, that's credited with sending women's rights back fifty years."|
|12**||Variable||"The store we're passing now is where British star Charlotte Crown was caught on film in the changing room eating and purging the same burrito over and over again. Just like a dog."|
|13||Epsilon Building||"This is the Epsilon Center. Anyone with red hair, please cover it for your own safety. If you really want to meet a famous celebrity, this place is packed full of them. Take an introductory course. It... it changed my life. Kifflom!"|
|14**||Variable||"To the left, you'll see a spot where a pizza boy claims that Clay PG Jackson asked him to remove his shorts."|
|15**||Variable||"You'll recognize this stretch of road from those videos of Jill Von Crastenburg with the Romanian shotput team."|
|16||Los Santos City Hall||"And here is City Hall. This is where the mayor's office is, if any of you care. You might recognize this building from the twenty minute final dogfight to save Earth in the movie Invasion: Los Santos."|
|17**||Variable||"The next corner is where actor Scott Stephens famously prolapsed after a failed party trick."|
|18**||Variable||"Remember when Lazlow was arrested for masturbating with an eggplant and shouting at women? That happened right here."|
|19||Oriental Theater||"And here we have the beautiful Oriental Theater. Riots broke out on the theater's opening night in 1928, as desperate fans tried to get up skirt shots of the legendary silent movie star Miriam Turner, much like you're doing today, except with really heavy cameras. My daughter tells me it isn't politically correct to say 'Oriental' any more, but considering some of the other common terms for Asians in the 1920s, the name could have been a lot worse. There's a saying, that to go to Los Santos and not see the Oriental Theater is like going to China and not visiting a Burger Shot. I've never really understood what that means, but... "|
|Finish||Vinewood Boulevard||"And here we are, back on the strip. As they say in Vinewood, that's a wrap, folks."|
|* The tour camera will focus on Tivoli Cinema across the road.|
** These minor points of interest are timed triggers, not tied to specific locations, so they may occur slightly out of sequence depending on traffic and will not change camera focus during the tour. They will be missed entirely when using the trip-skip function.
- Prostitutes can offer their services while the player is a passenger on the tour bus, only for the player to turn them down.
- It's a good idea to take the tour early in the game as not only does it help familiarize the player with that part of the city, the stories told by the tour guide provide backstory and foreshadowing for later missions.
- The tour bus can be occasionally spotted driving around the city, and as such can be stolen.