For other uses, see Von Crastenburg.
Jill Von Crastenburg is a character mentioned in both Grand Theft Auto IV and Grand Theft Auto V.
History[]
Background[]
Jill is a celebrity in the HD Universe featured in I'm Rich and regularly appears in stories on the celebrity news/gossip site, our-own-reality.com throughout the events of GTA IV, so some of her details may be tabloid hyperbole rather than actual fact.
Jill Von Crastenburg was born in Algonquin, Liberty City, into the Von Crastenburg Family, one of the richest families in the world. She is the best friend of Cloe Parker. Since her 11th birthday, she has been internationally famous for her extreme wealth and presence on the Liberty City party circuit, becoming one of the most photographed celebrities in the world. She was given a pair of diamond miners for her 12th birthday. After she could walk again, she was sent to 15 of the most exclusive boarding schools at the same time.
The Von Crastenburg Family owns many large homes. One of their many residences is a 45 bedroom mansion in Westdyke, Alderney. It is on Owl Creek Avenue, next door to the Parker Mansion.
Jill's own bedroom features murals of erotic fairy tales (i.e. "Little Red Riding Hood taking it in the can from the big bad wolf") painted by celebrity artists Simon & Nigel, and she owns a flying rabbit as a pet. Despite amassing one of the largest fortunes in the world, the Von Crastenburgs do not pay taxes by claiming to practice their religion inside their house, according to I'm Rich.
She is frequently hounded by paparazzi - the most outlandish examples include her being told to re-enact a tantrum because cameramen were not at the scene, and media attention for her doing the most mundane activities (buying STD cream in a Downtown Los Santos 24/7). According to Our-own-reality.com, she suffers from an unspecified eating disorder. She is extremely spoiled and self-absorbed. Jill has suffered from a nervous breakdown (in which she was placed in a psych ward for observation, though it was speculated that this was just a publicity stunt for an upcoming reality show).
Events of Grand Theft Auto IV[]
In early 2008, she began a three-week relationship with Cuban baseball player Ernesto Asaltacunas. At the beginning of GTA IV, she left him for a new boyfriend, and a sex tape was released of her cheating on him by giving oral sex to an Opium Nights valet, as her boyfriend paid the bar tab in the very next room. The tape quickly circulated on electrictit.com but was removed from the site.
Jill is also set to host a new reality TV show titled America's Sexiest Terrorist. After Tunnel of Death, a story appears on our-own-reality.com claiming she and Cloe Parker fought outside Maisonette 9. Later, after Diamonds Are a Girl's Best Friend, another story appears, making note of an apparent half-pound weight gain.
Events of Grand Theft Auto V[]
Although not seen physically in the game, Jill Von Crastenburg makes her presence known on the website Bleeter. A reading of her Bleets reveals her thoughts on wondering if she has grown up too fast and if 18 is too early to retire.
Her name appears on one of the many stars on the Vinewood Walk of Fame in Downtown Vinewood. During the Vinewood Star Tours, the tour guide says that Jill made some sex videos with a Romanian shot put team in the streets of Los Santos. Also, in the mission Vinewood Souvenirs - Mark, Nigel says he has Jill's pregnancy test on his wall.
Character[]
Appearance[]
According to the LCPD Database, she is only 13 years old in GTA IV. Also, our-own-reality.com says she is a college dropout, but they confirm that she is still in her teens. However, her sexual activity, popularity among the internet porn crowd, and admittance to bars make this doubtful.
However, in GTA V, she asks on Bleeter, "Is 18 too young to retire?" Since five years have passed since 2008, it again confirms she was 13 years old. Despite this, her profile picture on Bleeter is that of a far more mature woman.
Jill is seemingly one of three minors whose ages appear in the GTA series, the others being Mary-Beth Williams and Yuka Kasen. She uses a generic NPC model used by rich female pedestrians found around Rotterdam Hill and inner-city Algonquin.
Influence[]
Jill Von Crastenburg is based on Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie (as a teenager). Both of them have an extreme party lifestyle and, in the case of Paris Hilton, they are also a family well known for their hotel chain.
Additionally, the scenario is likely meant to poke fun at the unhealthy sexual images of Lindsay Lohan, Miley Cyrus and the Olsen Twins, while they were still under 18. Pedophilia is a topic discussed in the game.
Assuming that she was actually 13, she is most likely a caricature of modern children (especially wealthy and famous) growing up too fast.
LCPD Database Record[]
2007 - Public Lewdness
- Regular on the Liberty City party circuit.
- History of drug and alcohol abuse.
Gallery[]
Trivia[]
- Provisional stock footage of the underground tunnel at the abandoned Alderney Sprunk Factory and shots of Bullworth Academy from the promotional trailer for Bully: Scholarship Edition are used to depict a diamond mine and an unidentified boarding school she attended at some point, respectively.[1]
- Her Bleeter profile picture is an edited version of the unused phone contact picture of Jackie, a cut character from Grand Theft Auto V.
