- "I'm back bitches... and there's nothing you can do about it."
- ―Jack after his release from prison in 2013.
Jack Howitzer is an actor that appears in both the 3D Universe and HD Universe. He claims to have appeared in over 40 films before his prison stint. Howitzer's most notable role was as Tim, a war hero from the Evacuator films.
- 1 Biography
- 2 Inspiration
- 3 Image Gallery
- 4 Trivia
- 5 Navigation
Jack Howitzer's earliest known film, Loincloth, was released in 1984. He also appears on the radio that year in a commercial for Little Lacy Surprise and as an imaging voice on Emotion 98.3. In 1986, he appeared in the Evacuator sequel, titled Exploder: Evacuator Part II. In the next three years, he appeared in films titled Annihilator, and Zero Seconds to Death. Howitzer also frequently used steroids during his film career, leading to many film critics and talk show hosts mocking the fact they had apparently shrunk his genitals.
By 1989 Howitzer's popularity had eventually declined and his career slowed down. He released Special Needs Cop in 1992, a severely politically incorrect film in which he endangers the lives of special needs children and other innocents. He also became delusional, believing that his movies were real and the Soviet Union could still attack (despite the fact they had collapsed in 1991). In 1992, He was interviewed on WCTR's Entertaining America show where he accidentally and fatally shot host Billy Dexter (Jack thought that his gun wasn't loaded), also shooting at others on the scene. Jack was later put on trial for murder and faced the death penalty, although the outcome of the trial is not revealed. When interviewed by WCTR in a Los Santos prison awaiting trial, he admits to killing the original Ho Chi from the Exploder movies, also demanding his cellmate act like him.
Events of Grand Theft Auto IV
In GTA IV, the Weazel News website in The Ballad of Gay Tony reveals that Howitzer instead served 15 years in prison for shooting Dexter, was paroled by 2008, and was now set to have his own reality show. (Although main characters from 3D Universe were confirmed not to appear in the HD Universe, celebrities such as Lazlow, Fernando Martinez, and Derek the Dodo are reused entirely in canon).
Events of Grand Theft Auto V
By 2013, Howitzer was finally released from Bolingbroke Penitentiary. He is still clearly disturbed and uses "Ho Chi Sock", a sock puppet dressed as an Asian, to cope with his situation, as well as continuing to believe that the 1980s aren't over. According to him, the mid '80s to the early 1990s was the greatest time in the history of America. Howitzer is seen living in a motel and is being filmed as part of a reality show. In the show, a talent agent named Rufus Bellows is trying to talk Jack down from doing anything impulsive and to pitch a comeback film about Jack Howitzer, though apparently no one wants to be a part of it or make it, presumably because of Howitzer's current unpopularity, his mental and emotional instabilities, and because the script is apparently too dated for the present day.
- Arnold Schwarzenegger: Many of the films are Schwarzenegger movie parodies, such as Commando (Evacuator Part II; both are soldiers with their families kidnapped), Terminator (Annihilator, possibly in name only) and Kindergarten Cop (Special Needs Cop).
- Sylvester Stallone: Stallone's films are also largely parodied, such as Rocky (Push-Up) and the Rambo saga (Evacuator saga). Howitzer also speaks in a normal, if not aggressive, American accent which is closer to Stallone's.
- A howitzer is a type of artillery piece characterized by a relatively short barrel and the use of comparatively small propellant. The reference is explained by Howitzer's career in war films.
Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
- A SFPD officer mentions him. He will shout "I'm Jack Howitzer buddy!".
- A female pedestrian may also be heard saying "Jack Howitzer sucks" sometimes.
Grand Theft Auto: Liberty City Stories
- The host of Radio Del Mundo mentions Howitzer's name in Grand Theft Auto: Liberty City Stories, set in 1998.
- Toni Cipriani will mention him sometimes after killing someone, such as: "I'm a regular Jack Howitzer!"
Grand Theft Auto IV
- A pedestrian standing near a news stand in Algonquin states that Howitzer is getting his own reality show. He then says that Howitzer can suck Ho Chi's balls.
- If the player startles a certain female pedestrian, she will say out loud "Jack Howitzer's ballsack!"
Grand Theft Auto V
- His birthday is May 17, as stated in his Lifeinvader page. The year, however, is never revealed.
- He has his own website in GTA V: "JackHowitzer.com".
- On Jack's TV show in GTA V, much of his insanity is likely inspired by famous engineer Howard Hughes. Jack lives in a motel and urinates in bottles, similar to what Hughes did in his older years.
- The motel Jack is living in is located on Route 68 just west of Bolingbroke Penitentiary, between it and the town of Harmony and is identified as 'The Motor Motel' on the show.
- Jack's shooting of Billy Dexter is mentioned during a news segment in GTA V. The reporter talks about Jack resurfacing after shooting a radio host in the early '90s, and then continues to talk about people's complaints with his new show.
- His pants were added in the Independence Day Update in the chino's section.
- Jack makes a reference to the television comedy, M*A*S*H, on his reality TV show. He is heard saying, "I never meant to kill that baby! I thought it was a chicken!", a nod to the emotional finale of M*A*S*H.
Grand Theft Auto Online
In Grand Theft Auto Online, as part of the The Diamond Casino & Resort update, the player can buy Howitzer's movie posters (Evacuator, Exploder: Evacuator Part II and Push-Up - The Movie) and props used by him to decorate their Master Penthouse.