Dialogues in GTA San Andreas

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This is a list of non-mission dialogues in Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas.

Carl Johnson

Being arrested

Note: The following lines did not exist in the beta version.

• Do I look like a gangster? I’m a businessman! (when he's rich)
• What, you ran out of donuts?
• You can talk about this in the shower with your buddies! (when he has a 4-6 star wanted level)
• Fuck you po-po!
• Enough now, po-po!
• Just shut up!
• I don't want y'all doing nothing funny to me at the station.
• Well done, cop. Well done.
• Ahhh, screw you, cop!
• You like big man, huh? (when he's fat)
• My tax money go to this shit!?
• Shut up, bitch! (when he has a 4-6 star wanted level)
• Shut the fuck up, bitch! (when he has a 4-6 star wanted level)
• Shut up, po-po! (when he has a 4-6 star wanted level)
• Fuck you! (when he has a 4-6 star wanted level)
• Shut it, punk! (when he has a 4-6 star wanted level)
• I'll find you, fool! (when he has a 4-6 star wanted level)
• I ain't scared! (when he has a 4-6 star wanted level)
• You suck, asshole! (when he has a 4-6 star wanted level)
• You're boring me! (when he has a 4-6 star wanted level)
• You gonna fail me, calling you a bitch, bitch?!? (when he has a 4-6 star wanted level)
• Fuck you, asshole.
• I don't give a shit!
• You can't stop me, punk-ass cop bitch!
• Whatever motherfucker, you don't scare me!
• You asshole! I'm too fat to run. (when he's fat)
• Give me something to eat! (when he's fat)
• I'd come quietly if y'all feeding me. (when he's fat)
• I'll ruin your career for this! (when he's rich)
• C'mon officer, I ain't no gangster! (when he's rich)
• I can't run no more, po-po. (when he's fat)
• Okay, okay! Shut up and give me something to eat. (when he's fat)
• Do I look like I enjoy a foot chase? (when he's fat)
• You're wasting your breath!
• You got some spare donuts? I'm hungry. (when he's fat)
• I don't give a shit. I'm bored, and hungry. (when he's fat)
• Ah, shut up po-po. Give me a pizza. (when he's fat)
• Can I get a pizza over here? (When he's fat)
• Well done, you've caught a fat bastard. (When he's fat)
• I'm tired of running! And I'm tired of your shit! (when he's fat)
• Look, I'm fat and out of shape, unlike all you chumps. (when he's fat)
• If I was in shape, y'all wouldn't catch me. (when he's fat)
• I swear I didn't do shit. (when he's rich)
• Officer, there must be some mistake. (when he's rich)
• Sir, I fear you're making a terrible mistake. (when he's rich)
• Please sir, I'm just a young man trying to get ahead in life! (when he's rich)
• Officer, untie me this instant! (when he's rich)
• Please officer, give me a break here! (when he's rich)
• Do I look like a street criminal sir? (when he's rich)
• Come on, sir! I'm an honest man! (when he's rich)
• How on earth do you enjoy your job? (when he's fat)
• Hey there's a lot of hoodlums out there. Why you gonna pick on me? (when he's rich)
• Let me go, and we can both forget about this. (when he's rich)
• I got money, officer. Take it! Make your wife happy! (when he's rich)
• You ever get bored of your own voice? (when he's fat)
• You got some donuts we can eat? (when he's fat)
• You get job satisfaction, huh, one-time?
• You just a punk, po-po!
• You gotta understand, I don't give a fuck!
• Yeah, well done. I bet you real happy with yourself now.
• I'm being arrested by a bitch?! I can't believe that!
• Ah, shut up, copper, please!
• Let me go, bitch!
• You motherfucking fool!
• Tell it to your wife or your husband or whatever you got!
• Police asshole!
• I don't care about your bullshit, copper!
• Hey, I'm walking away from this, one-time!
• Really frightening! I'm really scared!
• This makes you happy, doesn't it?
• You better lock me up, 'cause otherwise you're dead!
• You enjoy wearing that name tag, too?
• You're wasting your grip!
• Enough with this bullshit, po-po!
• Oh, you real tough bitches, huh?!
• You got a happy life for you, mister?
• Ah, give me a break, one-time!
• Whatever you say, Mr. J!
• I don't give a shit!
• Shit, I'm glad I don't pay no taxes!
• I'll tell you what, one time, shut your fucking mouth!
• Oh, you're big man!
• Just don't get no ideas with that nightstick!
• Please, dude, do what you want, but shut up!
• Whatever you say, po-po!
• Come here and say that, bitch!

Threatening someone with a gun

• Fat man's got a gun, bitch. (when he's fat)
• You want a hole in you? (when he's fat)
• Yeah, fat fool's packing, bitch! (when he's fat)
• Ain't that a surprise, I've got a gun!
• It's my constitutional right, bitch!
• Welcome to America!
• Sup now, baby?
• See? I got a gun!
• You know what this is, huh?
• You lost the will to live, yet?
• Hey, what's cracking now?
• Oh shit, I got a gat.
• What's poppin' now?
• I'm a businessman, and this is my business!
• You want to get ventilated, huh?
• You want some lead in you?
• Do you want to look like Swiss cheese? (when he's fat)
• Hey, do you want a hole in your hair? (when he's fat)
• Oh yeah? That's right, I'm just a mark!
• Now don't be an idiot!
• I'm packing heat, fool!
• Yeah, what you gonna do now, huh?
• Hey, what were you saying?
• You think I'm just a fat buster!? (when he's fat)
• You better not calling me 'fat', fool. (when he's fat)
• I'm just a fat bitch, huh? (when he's fat)
• Oh, look. A gun.
• You want this to get real ugly?
• Stay cool.
• Yeah, got a gun in your face, huh?
• You're gonna stay cool, now.
• You happy now?
• You want me to shoot you as well?
• G's up, fool!
• I didn't forget how to bust!
• This is my business, playa!
• CJ run things now!
• What was you saying?
• You think I'm fat, huh? (when he's fat)
• Now you better shut up.
• You wanna get slapped!? (when he's fat)
• I'm fat, but I ain't slow! (when he's fat)
• You got a death wish?
• You want a hole in you?

One Star

• My Moms told me not to get into cars with strangers, dude!
• Come on, people are gonna think you're hard on me!
• Hey, I didn't do nothing!
• What are you trying to prove, one-time!?
• Dude, I'm innocent!
• You ain't gonna catch me, bitch!
• Okay, let's keep on running.
• Did you get bullied at school, officer!?
• You got issues, officer!
• Bully your wife, not me!
• You got big issues there, officer!
• You had fun back there?
• Grove Street is positive, dude!
• You look like a fool!
• You run like a bitch!
• I didn't do shit, man. Gimme a break! (there is an alternate version of this quote, but Carl says it louder.)
• Do we have to keep running?
• Can't you go chase somebody else?
• Ahh, stop treating me like a bitch!
• Does this really make you happy, officer!?
• Look, I can run ALL day!
• Why'd you bother to chase me? I'm faster than you!
• Do I dress like a gangbanger, sir!? (when he's rich)
• I'm a respectable businessman! (when he's rich)
• Oh, give up, copper! (when he's fat)
• Look man, I'm well dressed, but I ain't into dudes! (when he's rich)
• This will ruin your career! (when he's rich)
• To catch is me going to get real ugly for both of us! (when he's rich)
• Give up, you fucking chumps! (when he's rich)
• Officer, I do a lot of good in the community! (when he's rich)
• Come on, officer! (when he's rich)
• Your jealousy is pathetic, officer! (when he's rich)
• You should've finished college, dude, and got a real job! (when he's rich)
• I got an important job with waste disposal! (when he's rich)
• This is pathetic! (when he's rich)
• Officer, you really starting to annoy me! (when he's rich)
• C'mon man, cut that shit out! (when he's fat)
• Come on dude, give me a break! (when he's fat)
• You prejudicing against fat people, huh!? (when he's fat)
• I'm almost as fat and lazy as you, man! (when he's fat)
• I ain't running no more, copper. (when he's fat)
• I ain't big into this running shit, man! (when he's fat)
• This is one way to lose weight, I guess! (when he's fat)
• I ain't into this kind of exercise! (when he's fat)
• I ain't no athlete. (when he's fat)
• You're some kind of a fitness instructor? (when he's fat)
• Can't you go chase somebody else? (when he's fat)
• Do I look like I like running? (when he's fat)
• If you keep chasin' me, I'mma lose my cool. (when he's fat)
• You're gonna make me lose my temper, po-po. (when he's fat)
• I know I need more exercise, but not like this! (when he's fat)
• Make food, not war. That's my motto! (when he's fat)
• Dude, I ain't into this running shit! (when he's fat)
• I realize I didn't enjoy this. (when he's fat)
• Give up! Pretend I outran you!
• This is harassment!
• Hey man, you're creeping me out!
• You must be a punk at school, huh?
• Why are you chasing me? Your wife is lonely!
• I ain't into the dude thing, man!
• I'm in the Peace Corps, man!
• I ain't no gangbanger!
• I'm only running because you're chasing me!
• I ain't no banger!
• I'm innocent, po-po!
• Grove Street ain't a gang!
• Can't you chase a dude who wanna be chased?
• You getting bored of this?
• Is this your idea of fun?
• IS YOUR IDEA OF A GOOD TIME?!
• Come on dude, I'm innocent!
• I think you should go and see a shrink, officer!

Two-Six Stars

• I AIN'T YOUR BITCH OFFICER!
• You dick!
• I think you should stop with that shit!
• Cop asshole!
• Bribe-taking assholes!
• Ain't no one pay your ass off yet, huh!?
• Bring it on!
• You ain't scaring me, and you ain't stopping me!
• I'd give up now if I was you!
• BITCHES! (Carl says it once in a loud tone, and another in a more aggressive tone.)
• It's on now!
• Ain't you got nothing else to do!?
• Come on, tough guy!
• You punk-ass po-po bitches!
• This gonna get real nasty, fool!
• If I stop, you're dead!
• You're a dickhead!
• Get the army, I'm a fucking maniac!
• Idiots!
• You want me to stop, huh?
• You really want to fight me?!
• Make your life longer, stop running!
• Punk-ass busters!
• I ain't into this shit!
• You think I'm gonna give up?
• I don't want a nightstick up the ass!
• You want me to stop, huh?
• You assholes!
• You clowns!
• You motherfuckers!
• Give up, motherfuckers!
• You think I'm a bitch, huh!?
• You're fucking with a maniac!
• You motherfucking fool!
• You want me?! Come get me!
• You should stop blasting on me, fool!
• Think about it! Stop running, fool!
• I'm down for this shit!
• Stay the fuck away from me!
• Gimme a break! (at a 2-3 star wanted level, Carl says it in an exhausting tone. At a 4 star wanted level or higher, he says it in a more aggressive tone.)
• Hey, go chase some other fool!
• You like wearing uniforms, huh?
• You really want this to get messy, huh?
• You really want me to stop and start shooting at you?
• Don't make me turn around, fool!
• Punks!
• SCREW YOU!
• It's on now, bitches!
• You think you're hard, huh?
• Come on, then! Let's do this!
• Hey, this could get REAL ugly in a minute!
• I ain't backing down, bitch!
• I'm about to lose my temper!
• I ain't stopping, punk!
• You won't catch me, fool!
• Hey, this could get very ugly in a minute!
• You're really pissing me off!
• Keep on with this shit, you'll be sorry!

Car-jacking

• Welcome to San Andreas, fool.
• Remember, heroes get killed.
• Partner, this is straight jacking!
• Shit fool, you just got jacked!
• Let me drive for you.
• Give me this fucking car!
• Would you want to be a victim of a car jacking? Or a homicide?
• I'm having that!
• It's a robbery, don't make it a murder!
• Out now!
• Ain't this what they mean by "carpool"?
• I need that shit you driving!
• What'd you expect? It's America.
• Don't make me freak on you!
• You gonna have to walk now, sucker!
• I realize this ain't cool but forgive me.
• I'm having this!
• Hey forgive me, I don't know no better.
• Grove Street's having your car!
• Hey act cool now, it's just a robbery.
• Out, playa!
• Gimme that fucking vehicle!
• Hey, act cool and you still can live, playa.
• You don't wanna die, do you?
• I'm a loser, so hate me!
• Get outta the ride!
• This is car-jacking, playa!
• Don't take this personal, but you getting jacked!
• Get out the car!
• Get outta here punk!
• I'm sorry I had difficult childhood!
• Roll up outta here. NOW!
• That's MINE!
• Be cool, it's just a jacking.
• Gimme your whip fool!
• You could run, or get a beatin'. Easy choice, huh?
• Don't blame me; blame society.
• C'mon tough guy, I need your car! (when he's fat)
• It's a just a little robbery...
• Don't sweat it. It's just a jacking.
• Get out, playa!
• Fat man needs your car. (when he's fat)
• Come on buddy, get out of the car!
• Fat Carl wants your ride, peewee! (when he's fat)
• I'm afraid the fat man needs your car. (when he's fat)
• Now act cool. Run away! (when he's fat)
• I'm fat, but I ain't useless. (when he's fat)
• Caught slipping again!
• Hey, get out the car gangster.
• Heroes get popped, move!
• Blame society man!
• Get out the vehicle!
• Fuck around and I'll murder you, punk!
• Police! Get out of the car! (cop uniform)
• I'm investigating a murder and I need your car, honest! (cop uniform)
• I need this, police business! (cop uniform)
• Come on lady, I'm an undercover! I need your car! (cop uniform)
• Come on, get outta there!
• You've been slipping again, huh?
• Get out of the car, bitch!
• Let's move on.
• Go on fool, out!
• Don't make me shoot you homie!
• I need that vehicle!
• OUT!
• Come on, you need to exercise more!
• Excuse me, sir!
• I need your car homie!
• Come on, get out the car.
• Play cool and you're gonna be fine.
• I need the wheels, amigo.
• I'm harder than you. Don't make me prove it! (when he's fat)
• Don't sweat it. It's just a car.
• I don't do nothing but rob fools like you!
• Hey, I'm sorry!
• Can I borrow your car, sir?
• You ain't been hurt yet, so be cool!
• Ohh, you got car-slipping again!
• Get the vehicle up, now!
• I'm having this car!
• Hey, I'm just a street criminal, what can I say?!
• Hey, I'll take that!
• I'm jacking your sorry ass, punk!
• What can I say? I'm a bad man!
• You got the car of my dreams!
• Hey, it's just a car man!
• I know this seems bad, but it could've been worse!
• Homie, this is straight jacking!
• Make a fool happy!
• I'm jacking your sorry-ass car!
• I need this, I'm sorry!
• Now run or you'll get hurt!
• Chill, I'm just taking your car!
• I'm liberating your car, fool!
• Get out, punk!
• It's only a car crime, fool.
• My bad, homie!
• You got carjacked, fool!
• We both still cool, so run away!
• You've been robbed, but you still breathing!
• Give me that!
• I'mma need to borrow your whip, man!
• America's a cold place, baby!
• I'll take that.
• Come on, partner!
• This is straight jacking!
• Now you can buy a new one!
• Out of the motherfucking whip, bitch!
• You gettin' jacked!
• Dude, give me that ride!
• I know jacking a bitch ain't cool, but I need this whip!
• Out, fool!
• Out the car, homie!
• Don't take this the wrong way.
• Yeah, you got jacked, but you still breathing. Get on!
• You don't look like you need this!
• I know I ain't exactly a gentleman! (when the victim's a woman)
• I'm having your ride, dear!
• Hey, I'm ashamed of myself, already!
• My need is greater than yours, pal!
• Out now! (when he's rich)
• This nothing personal, I'm just a criminal!
• C'mon lady! I need the car! (when the victim's a woman)
• Mess with me, and I'll put you in the ground! (when he's fat)
• You got grappled, not capped. Keep it like that! (when he's fat)
• I like opening doors for ladies. Get out! (when the victim's a woman)
• Lady, I'm very sorry about this! (when the victim's a woman)
• Give me that ride, lady! (when the victim's a woman)
• Hey, I'm always told to help a lady out of the car! (when the victim's a woman)
• Forgive me, lady! (when the victim's a woman)
• Lady, this is nothing personal. Keep it that way! (when the victim's a woman)
• Out, lady! (when the victim's a woman)
• Come on, lady, get lost! (when the victim's a woman)
• Move! A gorgeous lady like you need a better car than this! (when the victim's a woman)
• Don't look at me bitch, get out! (when the victim's a woman)
• I need your ride, lady! (when the victim's a woman)
• I know you're a woman but I'm desperate! (when the victim's a woman)
• I need that car, lady! (when the victim's a woman)
• Forgive me but this is urgent!
• Come on, I'm in a hurry!
• Hey, it's just a jacking, so be cool! (when he's fat)
• I'm too fat to walk anymore, punk! (when he's fat)
• Don't let your ego get in the way of your survival! (when he's fat)
• Don't make me kick your head in! (when he's fat)
• Lady, I'm sorry I'm fat and lazy. (when he's fat)
• I know this doesn't help, but my family is messed up. (when he's fat)
• I need you whip, fool. (when he's fat)
• Hey man, it's just a car. (when he's fat)
• Relax, lady! Your insurance will pay, and you ain't hurt! (when he's fat)
• It's an ugly car anyway!
• Get out, playa!
• I need that vehicle!

Stealing a bike

• Gimme that fucking bike!
• Damn, you fell off?
• Gravity's a bitch, huh?
• You ain't gonna cry now are you?
• Off the bike!
• I'm having that bike!
• Go fuck yourself!
• What? You expecting an apology?
• The bike! NOW!
• Sorry, I'm a criminal.
• You got bike-jacked, fool!
• Get off that bike!
• I'm into jacking gang, baby!
• Now don't make this get really ugly.
• You just got jacked!
• I'm a bike thief, idiot!
• OFF!
• Don't mind me!
• Keep quiet and you won't get beat up over no bike.
• You want a beating as well?
• Gimme that bike!
• Now run or die, punk!
• Oops! Sorry about that.
• Don't make this worse for yourself!
• I'mma have to borrow this bike!
• I want your bike!
• I need your bike!
• It's nothing personal, I'm just a criminal!
• Sorry, but you're getting jacked!
• I'm having this bike!
• Shut up and get outta here! (when he's rich)
• You don't wanna die, do you?
• GET yo' ass outta here.
• Hey, I need that bike!
• At least you got jacked by a pro!
• It's a tough neighborhood!
• Give me that!
• Off the damn bike, fool!
• Get the fuck outta here!
• I need to borrow this bike bitch!
• Aw, what's wrong?
• Didn't somebody tell you bikes are dangerous?
• You okay? ...I hope not!
• Aww, you fell of your bike!
• Sorry about that. Now fuck off!
• Give me that bike and fuck off!
• Give me this, bitch!
• You just lost your bike!
• You wanna get FLATTENED!? (when he's fat)
• Gimme that bike, peewee! (when he's fat)
• At least I didn't break your neck! (when he's rich)
• Ooh, that look painful!
• YOU DON'T NEED THIS BIKE!

Crashing into another vehicle

• Did you buy your license?
• Inbreeding makes you dumb, huh?
• My car!
• Ah, well done!
• What kind of license you got?! A fishing license?!
• Whats your poison: grin or gin?
• You one serious fool!
• Ah, for fuck's sake!
• You buster!
• Thank you, you moron!
• My car!! My fucking car!!
• You have a bad week, huh? I'll make it worse, for that!
• I might be dressed okay, but I can still mess you up for that!
• Your mama must be proud of your driving, fool!
• You're out of your mind!
• Fuck, you hit me!
• Shit!
• Damn! My whip!
• Did you steal your license?!
• You hit me! I'mma hit you back!
• Idiot!
• Homie, I ain't enjoying this, neither would you!
• What in fuck's name are you doing?!
• My ride! Fool!
• Ah man, you went smashing up my whip!
• Ahhh, screw you!
• Look where you going!
• What you been drinking?!
• How you allowed to drive if you blind?!
• Ah! What you doing my wheels?
• Oh, you asshole! My shit!
• Can anybody in this state drive?!
• You even got a license, huh!?
• Oh homie, you're fucked up now!
• You've been drinking brake fluid!
• I ain't got time for this shit!
• Real slick, homie!
• You spend too long in the sun, moron!
• Ahhh G!
• I've seen some idiots in my time, but you're special!
• You a comedian asshole?!
• Ohh, shit!
• You hit my car, dumb ass!
• Ah, this ain't exactly funny!
• You better apologize before I get out and hit you!
• You think that's funny?
• You laughing, bitch?!
• I ain't laughing, asshole!
• What you on, fool?!
• You're a complete fucking moron!
• Buster!
• Fantastic! You hit me!
• Argh, I might get ugly on your ass, playa!
• You're fucking with a psycho, bitch!
• Ah, thanks! I really needed you to drive into me!
• Well done. Brilliant driving!
• Motherfucking bitch!
• Asshole!
• My whip, asshole!
• Don't hit me again!
• Come on, asshole!
• Homie, you tryna fuck with me!?
• Ahh, you really trying my patience, man!
• You better be drunk!
• Motherfucker!
• You want me to smash you now?
• Thanks dude. Thanks a lot!
• You hit me!
• My whip!
• I'm straight mad now, fool!
• You know what I did to get this ride, homie!?
• I can't believe you hit me!
• Who let you out of the mental home?
• Ahh, my whip!
• Are you mentally fit to drive?!
• You better wake up in there!
• Ah, man, thanks for that!
• Fuck you, man!
• You better stop treating me like a bitch, bitch!
• I'm really losing my shit now!
• You hit me fool!
• Who let you drive!?
• You fool!
• Fool!
• You fucked my car up!
• Do I sound like I'm laughing, asshole?!
• What are you doing?!
• Don't hit my ride again, punk!
• Thanks!
• You ruined my look, friend!
• My wheels, fool!
• I'm not in the mood for your bullshit!
• What's your problem?
• You wrecked my shit!
• I can't believe this shit!
• Motherfucker!
• You punk-ass bitch!
• Punk-ass bitch motherfucker!
• Damn!
• You chump! You hit me!
• How did you not see my car!?
• What you want, fool?!
• You mark!
• Look out!
• Ooh, I owe you one now, homie!
• You're in bad luck! I'm in a shitty mood!
• Get off the road!
• You hit me, you fool!
• Thanks man! I appreciate that!
• I appreciate that. Thanks.
• Are you a professional moron? Or just a gifted amateur?
• Aw, I wanna immigrate from here!
• I'll break your neck for that!
• Man, we're gonna have some words about that!
• I'll smash you up for that!
• I'm gonna need you to apologize, bitch!
• What wonderful driving!
• Who let you out of the hospital!?
• You wanna fight, asshole?
• You smashed my car, fool!
• You hit me, asshole!
• You hit me, punk!
• Thanks homie!
• Ah man, how did you not see me!?
• Come on, asshole!
• Ah, fuck you too!
• Aw, man!
• Somebody gonna be mad at you for screwing up their ride.
• You out your mind, moron?!
• You trying to ruin my day, asshole?!
• Get out the way!
• My ride!
• Hey!

Falling from a building or airplane

• Oh, shit!
• Damn!
• What the fuck!
• Bullshit!
• I don't need this shit!
• Oh, motherfucker!
• I hate gravity!
• Shit, damn!
• Aaaah!
• Oh, fuck, shit!
• Noooo!
• Oh, hell no!
• Oh, no!
• Ooh, shit!
• Aaaah, no!

Being car-jacked

• Get those dirty hands off me! (when he's rich)
• I need to exercise anyway. (when he's fat)
• How the fuck can you pull me around? (when he's fat)
• Oh man, I hate walking! (when he's fat)
• You ain't having my ride! (when he's fat)
• You want a party, bitch!? (when he's rich)
• Nobody jacks big CJ! (when he's fat)
• You can't just car jack the fat man...! (when he's fat)
• Hands off, you little bastard! (when he's fat)
• Unhand my blubber, asshole! (when he's fat)
• Oh man, I can't walk for shit! (when he's fat)
• I do the jacking, I don't get jacked!
• I might look rich, but I ain't some fool! (when he's rich)
• Asshole!
• I invented that, motherfucker!
• Fool!
• Not me, you dumb!
• You're dead, motherfucker!
• Ah man, you're fucked up! (when he's rich)
• Ahh, you're such an asshole!
• It's on now, fool!
• Your life just took a very wrong turn.
• Hands off, punk!
• I like your style, heh, and you're gonna like mine when you see it.
• Hey!
• Not this crap again.
• Think you hard, huh, playa!? (when he's rich)
• No you don't!
• Ahh, very funny!
• You piece of shit!
• Bitch!
• NOT MY RIDE, PLAYA! (when he's rich)
• Oh, you think this is funny?
• GSF ain't your bitch!
• Unhand me, bitch!
• I need this car, man. I can hardly walk! (when he's fat)
• You ain't get away with this, fool!
• Not this car!
• Nobody does that to Grove Street!
• You're about to get dealt with!
• You can't jack me!
• Aw, what's wrong with this place?!
• Hey, you fool!
• What am I? Your step child!?
• I ain't your buster!
• Ah, come on man, that ain't cool!
• Hey, fuck off, now!
• I ain't your bitch!
• You moron!
• You can't jack a Grove Street!
• My car, fool!
• No you fucking don't!
• You gonna regret that!
• HEY!
• You gonna be put on the ground!
• Hey, get off!
• Okay! We got a problem here, playa! (when he's rich)
• A fool like you can't jack me!
• I've seen your face, sucker!
• I guess I deserved this.
• You dumb hog motherfucker!
• NOT THIS RIDE, PLAYA! (when he's rich)
• Hey, fuck off!
• Get that back, now!
• I ain't in the mood for this shit.
• I need this car!
• Get off me!
• You should've killed me!
• Incredible. A jacking with a deathwish!
• Ohh, think you can jack a playa, huh? (when he's rich)
• You gonna get messed up for that!
• No one jacks me!
• I can't believe you just did that!
• You asshole trick!
• Nobody jacks big daddy! (when he's fat)
• You little asshole! Pick on somebody thinner! (when he's fat)
• You!? Carjacking me!? (when he's fat)
• Who you think you messing with!?
• I ain't feeling this shit! (when he's fat)
• I'm too fat for this shit! (when he's fat)
• You little punk! (when he's fat)
• I don't wanna be another crime statistic!
• You motherfuck!
• Ahh, where the police when you need them?
• No no no!
• Get your lil punk-ass off me!
• Just because I look fine, I ain't a bitch! (when he's rich)
• You callin' me a buster, punk!?
• Hey, I invented that, fool!
• Don't rip the clothes, dude! (when he's rich)
• You're about to get whacked, playa!
• What the fuck are you doing!?
• Get off me, partner!
• Ah man, you picked the wrong man to jack!
• I do the jacking around here, bitch!
• Nobody jacks me, playa!
• Not now!
• You wanna get murdered, huh!?
• You think I'm a mark, mark!?
• Man, what you jack a Grove Street for?
• Ah, real smart! Carjacking a psychopath!
• You gonna get slapped, fool!
• You got heart. No brain, though!
• Who do you think you're jacking, moron?!
• Oh playa, you picked the wrong one to jack!
• You shouldn't done that!
• Fucking chump, get off me!
• Not this playa, partner! (when he's rich)
• What you think this is, bitch?!
• You gonna regret that, dude. (when he's rich)
• That's a decent technique, bitch! But mine's better.
• Ah, man! You gotta be out your mind!
• Ahh, you just fucked up big time.
• You ain't having this whip, fool!
• Wrong option, pal!
• Get your fucking hands off!
• Get off my car!
• Nobody jacks CJ!
• Fuck you!
• Get your hands off me, buster!
• I'll kill you, you fuck!
• Get off me, mark!
• I ain't got time for this bullshit!
• You moron!
• You punk!
• I hope you do drugs, cause otherwise you're real dumb!
• No, you don't!
• You ain't getting my ride that easy, fool!
• Oh homeboy, I've had enough for this! (when he's rich)
• Do you know who I am, fool?!
• You can't jack me!
• What you think I am, huh!?
• Baby, you shouldn't done that! (when he's rich)
• Ah, you obviously don't know who I am!
• Oh, tough guy, huh?
• I must be slippin', get jacked by a buster like you!
• Do you know who I am!?
• What you think you're doing?

Fighting

• Make it easy on yourself and run away!
• Come on! Fight then!
• Come on! Punch!
• This gonna be easy bitch!
• Oh, you real hard huh?
• I warn you, I don't give a fuck!
• You got scraps huh?
• You got scraps huh bitch?
• You think you tough?
• Do you know who your fucking with?
• Head up, you and me!
• You're fucking with Carl Johnson! (when he has a 2-3 star wanted level)
• You know who you up against?
• You know who you messing with?
• It's your funeral asshole!
• You bitch!
• You should back down and run away!
• It's my constitutional right, bitch!
• You little punk!
• Run away fool!
• You gonna back down soon?
• Run away bitch!
• Hey, even my brother had already called me a buster!
• Come on! Show me what you got!
• Toe to Toe fool!
• Come on asshole, then fight!
• You just a bitch!
• You dead motherfucker!
• Come on, fool, run away.
• Nobody punches CJ!
• I'm your worst nightmare fool, so give up!
• You think you can take me on, you punk?
• Give up, homeboy.
• Let's do it, come on!
• Hey, I'm a positive role model!
• Oh, you think your hard?
• Don't hit me, I might cry.
• You calling CJ a bitch?
• You in a whole lot of trouble tough guy.
• Go on, run away homie.
• Let's go bitch.
• Trust me, I don't give a shit.
• Hit me then, homeboy.
• You're fucking with a maniac!
• Let's do it, come on.
• It's on now!
• Run away, save yourself!
• I'm a man of peace, baby!
• I'm trying to be a good person!
• You punk-ass bitch! (when he has a 4-6 star wanted level)
• I ain't your bitch! (when he has a 4-6 star wanted level)
• What you think this is, bitch?! (when he has a 4-6 star wanted level)
• I'm a well dressed maniac, fool! (when he's rich)
• I ain't just some bitch you can slap about! (when he's rich)
• It's on now, you and me! (when he's rich)
• I may look good but I'm a maniac! (when he's rich)
• I'm rich and fucking crazy! (when he's rich)
• Just don't ruin my clothes! (when he's rich)
• I wear nice clothes but I'm a killer! (when he's rich)
• I'm well dressed but I still ain't a bitch! (when he's rich)

When he's fat

• I ain't a fat bitch, bitch!
• I'mma eat you, fool!
• You can't take CJ out!
• You lil bitch!
• I'm gonna flatten you, fucker!
• I'm big but I ain't slow!
• You got a problem with the big man, huh!?
• C'mon, fool, c'mon!
• I'll put you to sleep, punk!
• Who you callin' a fat slob?
• I'mma put you to sleep, punk!
• You got a problem with the big man, huh!
• I ain't just a fat slob, asshole!
• CJ, remember that name!
• You think you can deal with the fat man, huh!?
• I got weight on my side.
• Let's go!
• Stand still!
• Hey, it's muscle under this fat, punk!
• I'd rather do a drive-thru than a drive-by!

When he's robust

• I'm gangsta.
• I'm showstopper!
• I ain't called Mr. Muscle for nothin'.
• I'm big and fast.
• Who you callin' a bendico?
• You got a problem with Mr. Muscle Man, huh!
• I ain't takin' this shit fool!
• I got muscle on my side.
• Yo ass is a waste of time, fool!

Killing pedestrians

• Welcome to America!
• Yeah, I'll shoot you in your face!
• I'm a punk? Am I?
• Welcome to San Andreas!
• I don't give a fuck!
• I'm a lunatic, fool!
• I'm a well dressed maniac, fool!
• Just don't mess up my outfit!
• Bitches!
• Welcome to Ganton, fool!
• Bang, bang, bang!
• Asshole!
• You should of stayed at home.
• You tricks!
• Punk ass bitches!
• You mark!
• G.S.F. for life!
• Screw you, asshole!
• You should have stayed the fuck out of my way!

Picking up money

• Guess you won't be needing this now.
• This should help keep my belly full. (when he's fat)
• Lunch money. (when he's fat)
• I should spend this on a good meal. (when he's fat)
• You got anything else? (when he's fat)
• Gimme that Grip!
• Aww you so kind.
• Ah, look at all these papers!
• That's very kind of you.
• Thanks, bitch!
• Next time you should put it in the bank!
• I'll never turn down paper.
• I need this more than you, I think.
• You've got a problem, fool!
• Is that all you got? Cheap fool!
• Give me them dollars!
• Come on, pay me! I'm a real criminal.
• I'll take that paper.
• That's going in my retirement fund!
• Is this for me?
• Gimme those chips!
• I need that!
• Yeah, them my ducats now.
• This ain't too classy.
• I like to share too, thank you.
• You don't need it, now.
• That's cool.
• That's my cash now, fool!
• Now don't move!
• Just a little money for CJ!
• Hey, pay a nigga!
• Send 'em ducats over here!
• Ah, you don't need it no more, huh!?
• With a mean bastard like you around here, crime really don't pay.
• Hey, gimme that paper!
• Hey, I'll have that now.
• Thanks!
• I guess it's true, you can't take it with you.
• Ah, thanks!
• Y'all don't need this no more!
• Can I have this?
• You don't need it now.
• This the best you got?
• Life's a bitch, huh?
• You don't need it no more, huh?
• Oh, you're too kind.
• It's going to a good cause. Me.
• Give me that!

When the police are crashing into him

• I'm not laughing, cop asshole!
• You're fucking me off!

Complimenting an NPC after they praised his...

...apparel

• These clothes? Yeah, they're tight.
• Just some old kicks baby.
• Straight. Good looking.
• Thank you. I love these shoes, you know?
• Fo' sho, thanks.
• Yeah, they gangster ain't they?
• This how Grove street kick it.
• Thanks gangster.
• I'm glad you like it.
• They ain't nothing.
• I know these shoes are tight, huh?
• I'm dressed, but I'm still a G.
• Yeah, real nice, ain't they?
• Cool, I appreciate that.
• Yeah, these shoes are alright.
• Yeah cool, I take care of my feet, you know?
• Alright. Straight gangster. Know what I'm saying?
• My G'ed up apparel? Yeah, straight.
• Whatch you expect, huh?

...tattoos

• That's why I had them hit up on me.
• Pure gangster, homie.
• They just tat's fool. But I got the heart to back them up.
• Yeah pretty gangster ain't they.
• Yeah i hear you, cool.
• The tattoos? You like it? Cool.
• I know I love this work.
• The ink? It's a'ight, I know.
• The tattoo? You like it? Cool.

...haircut

• The fade? It's straight gangster.
• My cut? You real kind.
• This cut? Awe thanks.
• Awe, thanks G.
• Yeah, good lookin'.

...muscles

• Thanks, I've been lifting a lot of weights.
• Yeah, I've been lifting a lot, you know.
• I lift weights because I find life empty.
• Yeah. Cool. Fo' sho. Thank you.
• Yeah, I lift weights cuz I'm all empty inside.
• Awe, thanks.
• Straight.
• Yeah, I've been working out.
• Yeah, I've been down to gym a lot.
• Yeah, I've been wasting my life down the gym.

...hygiene

• Yeah, I've just takin' up washing, G.
• My smell? Cool.
• Yeah, my cologne is tight.
• My cologne, cool? Thank you.

...car

• My wheels? Yeah its pretty nice.
• My car? Thanks.

Negative remark to an NPC after they've criticized his looks

• Won't you shut your bitch mouth, punk!
• Won't you fuck off, punk!
• Go tell daddy, bitch!
• Yeah, and you just a punk ass bitch.
• ...And you're a fool, so we straight!
• My God, you're one ugly bitch!
• Go bounce on your daddy's knee, bitch.
• What are you, a trick or a ho?
• Lady, please! Go somewhere out of my sight!
• Yeah, but you're dating a ho, trick!
• Yeah? But I ain't never seen a talking horse before!
• At least kids don't cry when they see my face, bitch!
• What you doing walking around without a bag on your face!?
• Put on some make up, lady. A LOT of make up!
• Hey, somebody lost the dog?
• You ain't exactly slick, fool.
• Where your pimp, bitch?!
• I had a dog once that looked a lot like you.
• You're an ugly dude.
• And I don't wanna be like you, ugly and a punk.
• You're terrifying the children!
• Yeah, you're stupid and ugly, bitch!
• Yeah, at least my women don't look like no pig.
• At least I look like the right gender, bitch!
• You're scaring the kids!
• Heh, look at you. Real playa, huh?
• Lady, you should wear a bag over your head!
• Wow, a camel that speaks!
• No wonder you ain't got no man, bitch!
• Your parents must be ashamed of you, fool!
• You're disgrace, fool!
• You know what? Fuck you.
• You should wear a bag on your face!
• You're ruining the neighborhood! Get out of here!
• You gotta start looking after yourself better!
• No wonder you're all alone, bitch!
• You pathetic, bitch.
• Yeah? But you look like an asshole so we even.
• Ain't you got a hole to stick your head in?
• No wonder you're sad and lonely, woman.
• Yeah? And you're one ugly bitch.
• Hey, it's a zombie running about!
• Go crawl back under a rock!
• Wow, I just seen for myself ugliest woman in the world!
• Wow, horse that walks on two legs! (when he's fat)
• Shouldn't be you're on all fours? (when he's fat)
• Get some self-respect, woman!
• You're lame, little peewee! (when he's fat)
• Whatever you say, you sad bitch. (when he's fat)
• You're an eyesore, woman!
• Heh, you ain't exactly a playa.
• Shut up, you annoying asshole. (when he's fat)
• Look at you, little asshole. (when he's fat)
• You pathetic. Look at you!
• You should eat more, fool. (when he's fat)
• Shut your mouth and bang your mama. (when he's fat)
• Little peewee fool! (when he's fat)
• Hey, I eat fools like you. (when he's fat)
• Hey little man, go be little someplace else! (when he's fat)
• Yeah? I bet you still wet the bet. (when he's fat)
• You're incredible! ...Incredibly boring.
• Well why don't you go and join the line to bang your mama!
• Whatever, bitch!
• Lady, you crapping my style with your ugly face!
• Get lost lady, you got a few problems of your own!
• Get out of here, bitch!
• I ain't interested in your shit, bitch!
• That's amazing, a talking dog!
• Come here and say that, bitch!
• You talk well for somebody who's inbred!
• Shouldn't you wear a bell around your neck!?
• Give me some space, buster.
• Hey, I've seen harder-looking puddings than you!
• Yeah, you're ugly, but your personality is even worse!
• Mind your own fucking business, lady!
• Yeah, and your face needs plastic surgery, bitch!
• Ugly bitch!
• Leave me the hell alone, bitch!
• You chump, look at you!
• Shut your mouth, punk!
• Look at you, you're awful!
• Shut up, little bitch.
• You're an embarrassment, fool.
• You just a bitch!
• Like I give a fuck about what you think!
• Fuck you, buster!
• Yeah, me!? Look at you, pathetic bitch!
• Who the fuck you think you're talking to, bitch!?
• Fuck you, punk-ass bitch!
• Screw you, asshole!

Accepting a prostitute visit

• Moms, I'm so sorry about this.
• I thought you never asked!
• You read my mind, lady. Get in!
• Okay then, I like to party.
• You don't have no VD do you bitch?
• Sure baby, I like to party!
• Okay then, I'm gonna show you a good time.
• Oh, for sure, get in!
• Sure, I like to party, why not?
• Hey, as long as you're clean, I'm down.
• Yeah, I'd like a good time...

Rejecting a prostitute visit

• No thanks, I'm clean. I wanna keep it like that.
• Hey, a man's got a need, but I ain't that desperate!
• No thanks, I'm just gonna get another broken heart.
• You ain't my type. See, I like woman.
• No way.
• N-O! Now, can you spell?
• Look at me, look at you. No!
• Hey, I don't need to pay for a friendship.
• I ain't into animals, lady!
• Oh please, on another planet, girl.
• You can't afford me, girl!
• Me, pay you? Get the fuck outta here.
• You and me? No way.
• No way, ho.
• HELL NAW!
• You ain't quite my style, lady.
• I ain't into bestiality, woman.
• No, I like clean woman.
• Ah baby, I can do better than you. No offense.
• You gotta be kidding me!
• Get the fuck outta here!
• Hey, I'mma tryna cleaning my act up, lady.
• I ain't into animals, lady!
• Hey, I'll pay you to get lost. How's that?
• N-O.

Recruiting gang members

• They told me you was a buster, prove me wrong.
• I'm gonna put in some work, you down?
• You want to represent the set, homie?
• Homie, let's go roll down on some bustas.
• For the Grove dude, we're gonna put some work in.
• C'mon dude, roll wit' me.
• C'mon man, we're families.
• C'mon, Grove Street 4 Life dawg.
• Let's roll homie, Families.
• Families 4 Life homie, you down?
• Prove you ain't no Balla or no buster homie.
• You down bitch, or what?

Responding to enemy gang members' questions

Positively

• Yeah that's right homie.
• Yeah bitch, kiss my ass!
• Yeah punk. Why?
• Yeah punk ass bitch, for sure!
• Yeah sucker.
• Yeah now show me some respect bitch.
• I am hell for you homie. Families.
• Families, fool.
• The original hood motherfucker, Orange Grove.
• Orange Grove Street Families.
• Families. Orange Grove Families.
• OGS punk. Hear that?
• You ain't got it yet? OGS bitch!
• 4 Life, busta. 4 Life!
• OGS in the house bitch.
• OGS 4 Life bitch.
• Orange Grove 4 Life, motherfucker.
• The Grove, fool.
• The Grove, perpetrator. What'cha gonna do about it!?
• What's it to you, buster? The Grove.
• I'm from the Grove, homeboy.

Negatively

• No-uh.
• Nah-uh. Nah.
• Chill, homie. I ain't into this shit.
• I ain't no gangbanger.

Winning at the casino

• YES! I won!
• Cee-Jayy!
• Show me some money!
• Look at me now!
• We shutting down Cluckin' Bells, tonight! (when he's fat)
• Look at me and weep, assholes. I won. (when he's fat)
• Look at me and weep! (when he's fat)
• I win!
• What a surprise, I won again. (when he's fat)
• Look at that, I won!
• Oh yeah!
• Give me some money!
• Ain't no stopping me now, suckers! (when he's rich)
• No stopping the playa! (when he's rich)
• Hell yeah!
• Look at that!
• CJ on fire! (when he's fat)
• Yeah, I can't wait to celebrate with a meal. (when he's fat)
• Big daddy wins again! (when he's fat)
• Look at that, I won!
• Carl Johnson, remember that.
• Pay the big man! (when he's fat)
• Now I can have a good meal! (when he's fat)
• My arteries are thick as my wallet, now! (when he's fat)
• Pay the gangsta!
• What's up, me!? I'm up!

Losing at the casino

• Fuck you and your casino!
• Well, look at that.
• Y'all cheating!
• Give a playa a break!
• What is this shit!?
• You're cheating! I know it!
• That's completely utter bullshit.
• What the fuck?
• Damn!
• I can't believe this, man!
• Damn you! (when he's fat)
• Come on, give me a break! (when he's rich)
• Oh shit, I lost. (when he's rich)
• Ohh shit, look at that! (when he's rich)
• This straight bullshit! (when he's rich)
• Hey, I'm a playa, not a paya! (when he's rich)
• Look at this bullshit!
• That's straight bullshit!
• Argh, look at that shit! (when he's fat)
• I'm so upset I gotta eat. (when he's fat)
• Oh shit, my breakfast money! (when he's fat)
• Oh damn, I lost my waffle money. (when he's fat)
• I can't believe that, I'mma have to eat to commiserate. (when he's fat)

Singing

• Warm it up Kane! Warm it up CJ! Warm it up Kane!
• Girl you dropped a bomb on me!
• Express yourself! Because I'm from Grove Street!
• Never gonna get it, never gonna get it, beyatch!
• Young hearts be free tonigh...! Aww, what was it...
• Rollercoaster...! Wahoo hoo hoo!
• Ain't nuttin but a G thang, bab-ay...
• Two loc'ed out niggas going crazy...
• Move your body, move your body...
• Take your time and let me love you good...

Police

Los Santos Police

• Nobody touches my mother. Not even my daddy.
• Nah, I prefer half and half to skimmed milk.
• Tell my wife I banged her sister.
• My squad car!
• I'm getting old here!
• I'm gonna fart if you don't move!
• You dick!
• You psychotic dick!
• I told him "Chill out", then I broke his arm.
• I'll take of this! Take care of my fish!
• LSPD, freeze!
• Police! Move!
• This is the police! Move!
• Nowhere to run ass-dick!
• LSPD! Stop!
• You! Stop!
• Don't move! Do not move!
• Come on, move!
• LSPD! STOP!
• He's getting away!
• Sarge, I said "I won't do it" and I got promoted.
• I can't believe you hit my car!
• You blind shitbag!
• Ah, my squad car!
• Awww, no...
• Duck! Get your heads down!
• Come on! Fight! Fight!
• I'm going in, I got a score to settle!
• Let me at the bastard!
• I'll get him, it'll be therapetutic.
• Hey, I've been sober for over a year!
• This guy's jerked me around for the LAST time.
• Target the bastard!
• You're busted, buddy!
• Come on pal! I got a wife and kids!
• Eat shit!
• You piss-stain! Stop!
• Give up bud! Stop!
• I got a clear shot on him!
• LSPD! Get out of the way!
• Move! I'm a damn cop!
• My dad was a cop.
• I won't shower at the stationhouse.
• I'm gonna give you the nightstick for that!
• That psycho's shooting at us!
• I'm gonna put you in a hospital pal!
• I'm just doing my job pal.
• Kill this asshole!
• Stop with the running, pal!
• You're mine, pal!
• Stop running you girl!
• Look at me pal; you're dead.
• You happy now, son?
• All right, all right you're coming with me!
• You're gonna shut up now asshole?
• You think you're smart, huh?
• Leave me alone!
• Don't make it harder than you have to stupid!
• Send reinforcements!
• Let's end your family tree right now!
• I ain't going solo with this maniac!
• Should've come quietly!
• You think you're a tough homie, huh?
• OK, I got you!
• You know your rights.
• You know the routine!
• Oh, you're one of them gangbangers huh?
• One move and i'll cap you right here!
• Stay down, asshole!
• Can't just one guy let me arrest 'em peacefully?
• Now freeze, you piece of shit!
• Don't even think about it!
• Don't move a muscle!
• Don't make this any worse for yourself, asshole!
• You! Stop it now!
• You're mine, buddy, mine!
• Don't annoy me again!
• Another crackhead for the cells!
• Careful now, you want PCP?
• Give me any trouble, i'll shoot you in the head!
• You wanna die? You wanna die?
• Now freeze, you piece of shit!
• You're not getting away, buddy!
• I oughta bitch slap you!
• HIT ME, GIRLIE!
• LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME! (While in shootouts)
• Move and i'll murder you!
• Move and i'll shoot!
• Gotcha! Haha!
• You're under arrest, shithead!
• You have the right to remain silent, mister!
• Tired of all you shitheads!
• I think this is the start in the dry out period!
• You still think that was a good idea?
• Don't move!
• You're coming with me!
• I can kill you any time, I'm a cop!
• Remember, I call a backup!
• Come on, come on!
• This is the LSPD, stop!
• This guy's mine!
• Hey, stop!
• I'm gonna kick your ass!
• I'd kick you if my pants weren't so tight!
• Officer. I need a backup! (also cops say this quote, when CJ was seen in police impound garages)
• You're mine now, kid!
• End of the line, scumbag!
• End of the road, kid!
• I'm sick of doing this, i'm hungry!
• You're under arrest!
• Hands where I can see them!
• Hold it right there!
• You've gone too far this time, sonny!
• Hold it!
• Time to visit the big house!
• Get out!
• You got a problem with authority?
• I've been training for this all morning!
• Get your hands off me!
• Oh yeah? you'll love jail, it's dry!
• Look out!
• Oh great, jail, another booze-free zone.
• We all have the right to remain stupid.
• Easy boy, don't give any attitude!
• Don't worry, we all die at the end!
• Yeah, life is a bitch and then we die!
• Bring it on!
• Why don't you guys stop reproducing?!
• You don't wanna push me again!
• Watch it buddy!
• Okay, you know the drill!
• You are under arrest!
• Let's do this nice and easy, missy!
• Let's get this over with!
• Just let me arrest you.
• Put them where I can see them!
• Here we go again...
• Okay kid, fun's over!
• All right, spread them!

San Fierro Police

• Watch where you going!
• Sorry, my fault, entirely!
• Did you hurt yourself?
• Yeah, let’s connect!
• Did your mother drop you as a child?
• Hey, watch it!
• Hey, I just polished these shoes!
• When you see this badge, step the hell aside!
• Police, out of my way!
• Let’s see what you got, boy!
• Take it like a man!
• Bruise yourself for pain!
• When I kick your ass, I’m gonna fuck it!
• Careful, I know how to use this stick!
• Move it or loose it!
• I’m gonna take you down!
• First i'm gonna beat you up, then i’m gonna beat you off!
• Do you wanna bump up? Come on; Show me what you’re hiding down there!
• Stop, I can help with your anxiety!
• Man to man, like nature intended!
• Prepared for a beating!
• You wanna bump up, huh?
• I’m gonna violate your ass!
• Come on, pal, one fist or two?
• How can I help you? Please stop!
• I’m actually a social worker in a uniform!
• Let me help you, I’m a social worker!
• I can help you crying out with my help!
• Did your daddy kiss you?
• Fighting is never the answer!
• I just wanna know why you’re so unhappy!
• No problem, i can wait!
• Whenever you're ready!
• Take your time, no rush!
• Wait, bro!
• Come on, we can get on the bottom with this!
• Why you wanna hit me?
• Stop, we can hold hands and talk about it!
• The police are your friends!
• I’m licensed by the state!
• I'm a police officer, not a marathon runner!
• I'm too young for this shit!
• Hold it, I’m also a social worker!
• Slow down!
• Stop, you’re just troubled!
• This is one fast bastard!
• Didn’t your mommy love you?
• Come, let’s open a constructive dialogue!
• I feel your pain!
• You have a death wish, punk?
• Slow down!
• I can make this look like a suicide, you know?
• You’re leaving me no choice; I got to kick your ass!
• You can’t escape!
• This better not be a toy gun, cause i am shooting your ass!
• Your hands go up, we don't shoot!
• You ain’t losing me, asshole!
• I’m dragging your ass to jail!
• I’m right behind ya, buddy!
• I’m going to terminate this chase at any cost.
• I can cancel in your therapy on Thursday!
• Get away, the cops are after you!
• You're in my sights, i never miss asshole!
• I never miss, twice!
• Careful, i heard Five-O is in the house!
• Carjacking is just a cry for help!
• By running away, you diss me!
• Therapy can turn you into a productive citizen!
• Inside every criminal is a scared little child!
• My wife puts up a better fight!
• Slow down, damn it! I just ate!
• Is something wrong? can I help?
• Glad you're not wasting any gas in the car!
• I love your not polluting escape method!
• My nickname on the force is Clean Harry!
• I'm sticking my pistol in your mouth!
• I smell the fear of a criminal!
• I’m on your ass, daisy!
• Come on, let’s talk about this!
• This badge does not break for no one!
• What will shooting me solve?
• Don't frighten him, come on we can help him!
• Attacking authority figure, I like it!
• You can’t escape!
• Hey, that's public property!
• Yeah crush that gas-guzzler, right on, smash that polluting vehicle!
• Did your parents ever crash your toy car?
• Smash the car, man, I hate America anyway!
• Hey, that's a legitimate expression of frustration!
• Those sneakers better not be from child labor!
• You see me coming, don’t ya?
• I’m on the edge, asshole!
• Hey! I'll book you for resisting arrest!
• You gotta be America's dumbest crook!
• Not on my watch, buddy! Not on my watch!
• You just crossed my thin blue line, asshole!
• I’m gonna slap you good!
• I got a good cellmate for you, he loves to cuddle!
• Get your bitch and switch!
• 10-15, prisoner in custody!
• Drop your pants, honey!
• Drop in the name of the law!
• You like guys in uniform or something?
• Wanna grab my pistol?
• Let’s wrestle to submission!
• Wrestle me, honey!
• Let’s hope we don’t have to hurt him!
• You have the right to remain gorgeous!
• Gotcha, honey!
• I am taking you down, sugar!
• You won't lose me, honeybunch!
• You wanted to be caught!
• You're going down, handsome!
• Let me tell you my hourly therapy rate.
• Whoo, check his weapon!
• About time, you son of a bitch!
• Don’t move a muscle!
• I got you punk, stay down!
• What are you doing?
• You’re going downtown!
• My ex-wife drives better than that!
• What the hell are you doing?
• You better pay a price for that!
• Son-of-a-bitch!
• Hey!
• Tell me about your childhood.
• I could read you your rights, but why bother?
• Assume the position, honey!
• Say hi to Virgil in cellblock D!
• Let me see that smirk now, cowboy!
• You have the right to remain silent!
• You have the right to talk to a therapist!
• We can work out therapy schedules later!
• Thought you can get away with breaking the law?
• I got you, son of a bitch!
• You're going straight to the station, asshole!
• We're gonna have so much fun with you at the station!
• You know what I can do with my baton?
• You were a handful!
• Sucks you got caught, San Andreas prisons are a travesty!
• Promise you'll call me if you feel suicidal!
• Fight the power, comrade!
• You're going down.
• You weren't gonna get away!
• Violence only breeds more violence!
• Not so cocky now!
• Take a rest, flyboy!
• Did your parents fight a lot?
• I'll bust you out at midnight, comrade!
• This must be so hard for you!
• Something's going right! For once...
• You know your rights! Right?
• At last I got you, you shit!
• You got prison bitch written all over you!
• You're busted, sucker!
• Get down and stay down!
• At least you didn't get away from me!
• You're busted, asshole!
• Well hot dog, I got him!

Las Venturas Police

• Kicking names and taking ass! Oh wait.
• If I die, tell my wife she's a bitch!
• If I don't survive, tell my wife she's a bitch.
• You're under arrest asshole!
• Fun's over, buddy!
• You ain't so tough now, huh?
• Pull the trigger pussy!
• I serve my community by kicking ass!
• YOU MOVE IN! I have kids!
• There's no cameras around to catch this beating.
• Wake up chickenshit!
• Look at this lucky ass!
• Move your vehicle!
• Get out of the way!
• You're gonna have to move!
• Move, police!
• 'scuse me!
• MOVE!
• Come on! Move!
• Hey, this is official police business!
• Hey!
• You're wrong, I'm right. I'm the cop!
• Go ahead; you don't have the balls!
• You wanna play rough?
• HEY! BEAT IT!
• I got the visual on the suspect!
• Some guy's fooling around with my wife.
• She's a goddamn cheating wife.
• Goodbye Angela!
• My beautiful squad car!
• That guy's trying to kill me!
• He's trying to kill us!
• Your head's gonna get busted for this!
• Come on tough guy!
• That's it buddy, you're dead!
• Come on! There's cops everywhere!
• GO!! GO!! We got this kid!
• You think you could get away from me?!
• Show's over buddy, give up!
• You are surrounded! Give up!
• You've been messing with the wrong cop!
• Just try punk, just try it.
• You're about to be in a world of pain, boy!
• You little asshole!
• I got a 11-54 in front of me!
• One false twitch and you're a 99A!
• You lose your glasses?
• You see this badge?
• Damn it! I need some help!
• Great, now you're making me run?
• You think I need some evidence?
• I got a plan, cover me!
• Ow! My coffee!
• My car is signing your death warrant!
• I'm a cop you asshole!
• Cop killer!
• Don't be a hero Martinez, stay down!
• What the hell?!
• 11-82 in progress!
• You can't hit a police car!
• Psycho at the wheel!
• INCOMING!!
• You think I'm the good guy? I'm the bad guy!
• Nice work kid!
• Eff you this is a police car!
• San Fierro needs more guys like you.
• Don't expect a reward, kid!
• Hey! Look over there!
• Hey! Look behind you!
• MOVE IN!
• What's this wise ass trying to do?
• This little chase is making me angry!
• We're all over like stink in shit!
• Smile you son of a bitch!
• You're MINE!
• Don't move a goddamn muscle chump!
• You're going down asshole!
• You're gonna have a whole lotta fun inside, pal!
• Hey, we're blocked in here!
• YOU!! MOVE!
• You're pushing your luck.
• Have a look at your heart while it's still beating!
• Get down, GET DOWN!
• Feel like committing suicide by cop?
• Gimme some help over here!
• I don't believe this guy!
• Eat the concrete, punk!
• 10-15, prisoner in custody!
• He's down!
• AWWW!
• Hey watch it!
• I'm gonna enjoy this!
• Don't lean on me, I lean on you.
• OK, we'll settle this the hard way.
• You looking for a attitude ajustment shitsmere?
• I don't know anybody called Miranda!?
• Let's settle this!
• I'd wish I shot ya!
• Just try it!
• Just try punk, just try it!
• Put the damn gun now son!
• You won't get away from me!
• You're trapped!
• Looks like we got the last lap boy!
• We're gonna blow your legs!
• Time for a screen test, asslip!
• Anything you say, you better talk!
• This makes my whole day worthwhile.
• You're gonna die!
• You will regret that!
• Where do you think you're going?
• PIECE OF SHIT!
• Damn it, shithead!
• Suspect is under control!
• Shithead!
• This ain't a good day for you!
• Thats it!!!
• MOFO!
• Nice try dickface!
• Yeah, yeah!
• Give it to me baby! Give it to me!
• Choke on this asshole!
• Never arrested a corpse before!
• I oughta pop you right now!
• Anymore of your bullshit and i'll blow you away!
• Cuff and stuff this malabastard!
• You could have been killed!
• I'm immortal!
• I spy with my little eye!
• I'm in pursuit!
• You're going down pal!
• Mono en mono, you're surrounded!
• Dog turd!
• Don't move, Adam Henry!
• Five arrests today and you're number six!
• Don't move a Goddamn muscle!
• MOVE IT WISE ASS!
• Hey fender lizard, move it!
• I got him spotted! I got him spotted!
• Cover my ass goddammit!
• WHOA! Man down! Man down!
• Freeze, douchewipe!
• Much obliged, citizen.
• Suicide by cop? Is that what you're over?
• God if I lost him...
• I need backup!
• I need backup to establish a perimeter!
• Surrender!
• Let's make this a D.R.T: dead right there!
• Let's go boys!
• Your luck just ran out!
• You've just met the Ventura crime dog!
• End of the line, punk!
• You're going away for a while!
• It's over, you chump!
• Pull over, you freak!
• Party time's over, buddy!
• I'm on your ass, boy!
• We're gonna have some fun with you, boy!
• You're in my world now!
• You're under arrest, buddy!
• Stay down, gangbanger!
• Where did you take your first shower?
• Nowhere to run!
• You're going down, punk!
• Up against the wall, punk!

Countryside Police

• Police, move!
• Excuse me, please!
• Out of the way!
• Don’t you push me there!
• Take the boat out fishing this weekend.
• Pardon me!
• Get back here!
• Come back here, you’re under arrest!
• Stop running away, boy!
• I will kill you, boy!
• My daddy told me about guys like you!
• You’re getting yourself in a whole heap of shit!
• You think I didn’t kill bigger bands than you, pal?
• I’m a racist, boy!
• The judge's gonna strangle you up!
• You have violated a number of laws!
• Don't move an inch!
• Don't even think about it!
• Drop your weapons now!
• Don't even think about it, boy!
• Stop right there!
• Freeze, you're under arrest!
• Freeze, boy!
• Give up, boy!
• You don’t hit cops in my town, boy!
• You're lucky I didn't kill ya yet, boy!
• Freeze right there!
• It's a night in jail for you!
• Freeze, dirtbag!
• After I'm done, you wish you was dead!
• I’m gonna mess you up, boy!
• Hands up where I can see 'em!
• Don't struggle, we got you now!
• Out of your little mind, boy!
• Time for a visit to the station!
• Gonna lock you away from decent folks!
• Stop now!
• Where your big city ways now boy?
• We've got different laws out here for you, boy!
• Ain't nobody know your here, son!
• You have the right to shut the hell up!
• Everything by the book!
• I can hardly wait to put you in!
• You await your death, boy!
• You're a long way from home, boy!
• Get out now, you're under arrest!
• Think you can mess with the country, boy?
• That's beyond a misdemeanour boy!
• I see you, boy!
• You're officially under arrest!
• You're gonna be real sorry, son!
• You think you’re tough now, boy?
• Your ass is mine, son!
• You are under arrest!
• You disgust me!
• I’m on to kill you!
• Think you can mess with the country boy?
• Hey, dumb bastard, look at me!
• You should play nice, boy!
• Right in my sights!
• I’m gonna put my pistol in your mouth!
• Yeah, boy, happy now?
• Put your hands behind your head!
• Fella, you picked the wrong county.
• You're under arrest, boy!
• Stand still, you!

Police boat

• Suspect is overboard.
• Where you gonna swim to?
• Get out of the water, you can’t escape!
• He tries to swim away!
• There he is, in the water!
• We’ve got a man overboard, a man overboard!
• Oh, you think you’re a fish, huh?
• Get out of the fucking water, right now!
• There he is!
• Get out of the fucking water!
• Hey, get outta there!
• We’ve got a suspect in the water. Repeat: A man in the water!

Police helicopter

Like in Grand Theft Auto III, the pilots can get into arguments over the microphone.

• We've got a clear vision on our suspect and we’re about to open fire.
• Co-Pilot: I see her, SHE'S beautiful!
• Pilot: HE'S over there!! He's A GUY!!
• Co-Pilot: Hey, when I kill him, do I get a medal?
• Pilot: You get two!
• We've got a clear shot on the suspect. You, STOP RIGHT NOW!
• Suspect is about to be apprehended with extreme force.
• This is aerial support - the suspect is about to get terminated.
• You’re going down, hard man, right now!
• Give up, the game’s up.
• You think you’re hard, huh, asshole!
• We’re the police, you moron, we’ve got helicopters!
• This is aerial support - we’ve got a clear vision on our Suspect.
• Put your hands up, it’s over!
• Pilot: There he is, shoot him!
• Co-Pilot: Why do I have to do all of the shooting?!
• Pilot: Because I'm a pacifist! Kill him!
• Suspect is trying to escape - we have to soon stop that.
• We had a headshot on you, tough guy. Stop!
• This is aerial support - we’re about to neutralize all visible threats.
• Co-Pilot: Hey, I can see my house from here-
• Pilot: Dave, will you shut the hell up!
• You, stop!
• Ho...hol...hol...hold this thing steady and I'll shoot him in the head!
• You’re in trouble now, bad boy.
• This is chopper support - suspect is in sight.
• This is heli support - I’m gonna put the suspect down!
• This party is gonna be shot down!
• You’re mine, tough guy!
• You! Stop, or we will kill you!
• We are the good guys, you little chump!
• Pilot: Shoot that asshole!
• Co-Pilot: I’m trying, I’m trying!
• Co-Pilot: You, stop!
• Pilot: Just kill him, you pussy!
• Suspect is escaping, repeat: Escaping!
• You can’t escaping, asshole!
• Pilot: Stop! Police!
• Co-Pilot: I think he knows that by now!
• You! Stop running! Now!
• It’s time to shut you up, asshole!
• Pilot: Playtime is over, kid!
• Co-Pilot: Oh, you’re so dominating!
• Pilot: Jim, do you see anything?
• Co-Pilot: Higher! Shoot him!
• Co-Pilot: Where is he?
• Pilot: Over there, you dick, kill him!
• You’re going to respect the law, pal!
• Hey, stop, or we will kill you!
• We’ve got a clear sighting on our suspect!
• We can fill this guy full of holes!
• Pilot: You can stop running now, suspect!
• Co-Pilot: Oh, you’re so really butch!
• Pilot: Man, stop photographing those women and shoot the bastard!.
• Co-Pilot: Hey, shut up!
• I'm gonna kill this guy! Make sure it's the right guy this time!
• Stop!

Motorcycle police

• Don’t make this a 998!
• I'm going to call the police! I believe in sharing.
• You have a last request?
• You are going down!
• I’m ready when you are, pussy!
• I’m gonna get that bastard!
• Bring it on!
• You wanna fight a cop?
• He's my color, back off!
• No need for backup, boys!
• Officer, requesting backup!
• Easy there!
• I need backup here!
• Hey!
• Let’s see what you got!
• Careful, partner!
• Where'd you learn to throw a punch?
• This one’s mine!
• I’m going after it!
• I’m gonna hum with you!
• Ah, you want some of this?
• I wanna be alone with my bitch!
• It's county blues for you, chump!
• I'm going hunting, alone!
• Hands behind your back, son!
• Tell it to the judge, homeboy!
• You're going to jail, mack-daddy!
• I'm gonna kick your mack-daddy ass!
• Stay out of insurance, bitch!
• You're coming downtown!
• I'm sure you already know this feel!
• This can go one of two ways!
• Start naming names, asshole!
• Tell it to the judge, playa!
• Time for good old-fashioned police brutality!
• I'm taking you in!
• You people never learn!
• Mr. Johnson, you are under arrest!
• We've got ourselves a Johnson kid!
• We got you now, CJ!
• Keep quiet and come with me!
• You're going down, my man!
• You're the rabbit in the hole!
• Give it up, CJ!
• Save the energy for the prison, you'll need it!

S.W.A.T

• I'm gonna take you out asshole!!
• You're gonna die!!!
• You yellow bastards! Stop
• YOU PIECE OF SHIT! GET BACK HERE!
• Take him down once and for all!!
• Holy shit!! Get down!!
• Move in move in move in!!
• Look out below!!!
• Let's go! Let's go! Let's go!
• I ain't walking away from this shithead!
• You're gonna die asshole!
• Return fire! I'm going in!
• Eat dirt!
• I hate this bit.
• Comin' in hot!
• S.W.A.T team coming in!
• We're all over your ass homeboy!
• I'm gonna drop him!
• Mother: I love you!
• Incoming fire!!
• Stop! Stop! You shit!
• Watch out below!!
• Aw shit! I'm stuck!
• Target spotted: Get down here boys!
• Get your weapons down before this gets worse!

Army

• KILL EVERYTHING!
• Mono e mono!
• Two by two!
• Come to daddy!
• Blow him away!
• KILL THAT IDIOT!
• I'M GONNA FUCKING TEAR YOU APART!
• Watch yourself!
• You went personal, huh?
• One and one, ha!
• Oh no you don't!
• Advance!
• Go, go, go!
• Get out!
• Why am I so jumpy?
• Man, I'm getting the heebie-jeebies.
• WE HAVE WOUNDED!
• Where's that menace?!
• Chew him up!
• FIRE AT WILL!
• Cut her down!
• TAKE HIM OUT!
• NEUTRALIZE THE TARGET!
• Let her rip!
• INTRUDER!

Gangs

Grove Street Families

• Come on Carl, relax!
• Aw shit! The car's on fire!
• Time for no kicks, Carl!
• What's with that motherfucking hooptie Carl?
• That clothes is not gangsta, Carl.
• You deaf or something Carl?
• Hey CJ man, I like the threads.
• Los Santos is cold in a motherfucker!
• Oh we upside-down now, bitch-ass!
• Family violence, yeah!
• Kick back Carl, damn!
• Bang bang ballsack, how do you like that?!
• See you round, homie.
• Still banging dude! Still bangin'!
• Take that, ballsack!
• Who's the bitch now homie?
• Oh that shit is whack, homie!
• You never seen no gangsta?
• Guh...thanks man...! (coughs)
• These kicks insult me personally.
• Ass touchers can't see us!
• I ain't drinking that bullshit!
• Where's that ho ass sister of mine?
• We families positively sir! We just protecting the hooood, officer!
• Screw you vagina holes!
• Sherm is my ho-MAY!!
• CJ I'll jack you a better car!
• Get these bizzals in yo jizzals!
• Any of y'all seen sheefa?
• Come on CJ, why you doing that?
• Is this a Balla bar?
• What is going on man? Move out of the way!
• Hey, watch it homie!
• Hey playboy, watch that!
• Hey CJ! What'cha doing?!
• They are all mine!!
• Where did you get your license from?
• I can't go back to jail!
• You must be smokin'!
• My grandmama drive faster than that!
• CJ you're a maniac, man!
• It's on motherfuckers!
• Hey man! Who did that to your hair?
• Why do you do that shit?
• Bangin' and more bangin'. Bang, bang!
• You need to kick your barber's ass!
• Aw no no no! Damn! Look what you did to my ride!
• Hey man! Watch it!!
• I ain't scared of you! Don't let me get mad, officer!
• You are IGNORANT!
• Hey baby! Right over here, baby!
• Don't be eyeballin' me fool!
• Florida fucker!
• I'll kick yo ass man!
• You gone to tear da car up!
• Who taught you how to drive?
• That car is do-do!
• Hey yo hair is whack!
• Hey man! Look at me when you die!
• I'm a maniac! I can't be stopped!
• Hey man, pass the blunt!
• What up boy?
• Ryder was right about you CJ!
• I want the best CJ!
• Grove Street OG coming through!
• Can I get my drink on?
• Man, how come you can't see me?
• Wait a second!
• CJ, who's been drawing on you?
• Am I invisible over here?
• Shit! I'm suckin' a roach!
• My motherfucking car, look at it!!
• You hit me fool!!
• Aw man, my shit!
• Aw you hit me! You motherfucking fool!
• You're in dog shit man, I don't give a shit!
• Bay-sucking fools!
• South-side fools!
• Suck on my 9, Ballas!
• I want the best motherfucker.
• What is this shit you're drinking? Not exactly premium liquor it is.
• Keep up your speed, CJ!
• Aw man, we're on fire!
• Aw man, we're stuck in the burning bucket! Oh shit!
• Fool! You hit them! Look out!
• CJ nooooooo!!!
• Now we're rolling CJ!
• Kilo Tray's lookin' for trouble.
• A Johnson boy in a hooptie? A fat bastard!
• Hey nice ride CJ!
• Hey man, respect the ink dude!
• Slammin' ride CJ!
• Looking popped holmes!
• Trippin' cartoons CJ!
• Aw man!! You asshole!
• Dumbass car!
• Aw man! Shit, it's all broke!
• Aw man, this is good weed.
• CJ, you're ruining my buzz here.
• You've been messin' with the Grove!
• We need a car!
• Yo we got enough CJ!
• Hey! Chill, motherfucker!
• Get your fucking hands off me!
• Oh man! That fucker's in my car!
• That's my brother's ride!
• No man, got better shit to do.
• I was just complimenting CJ!
• Man that ain't cool!
• What's up holmes?
• Man! Life is beautiful!
• Northsides go home!
• Who rolled this piece of shit man?!
• You tryin' to kidnap me fool?!

When Carl drives fast

• Shit! Slow down homie!
• Slow your row CJ!
• Slow down, for goodness sake!

When Carl drives recklessly/crashes the car

• Glad it ain't my ride.
• You can't drive for shit!
• Shit, you drive like a motherfucker!
• Open your eyes, CJ!
• CJ, you drive like a bitch.

Fighting

• Ball-ass bitches!
• Bitch-ass lowlife, Ballas!
• We gotta spray these Balla fools!
• You're going down Balla bitch!
• You want some of this bitches?!
• Varrios goats!
• ASS-tecas have been lying down!
• Ballas gonna cry to moms!
• Vagos eat my shit!
• VLA are gonna bleed!
• Die VLAs!
• Die LSVs!
• Vagos die!
• LSVs die!
• LSV killa!
• VLA killa!
• Vagos vamoose!
• Vagos eat shit!
• Death to Varrios!
• Death to Aztecas!
• VLA are gonna fade, man!
• Go back to your ugly Varrios!
• Vagos can't see me!
• Those aztecs fools.
• Hey Aztecas!
• Come on Ballas, let's go!
• Vato fools!
• Those Aztecas are all mine!
• Take that ya LSV bitch!
• Az-dicks!
• Hey Ballas! What's up now?
• Ball-LESS!
• I'm not scared of no ASS-lickers!
• Hey Ballas cocksucka!
• Cover me!
• Duck homie!
• Heads down! Duck!

When CJ activates flying cars cheat with GSF members.

• WOOO!! Now we're movin'!
• WOOO!! We're flyin'!
• Aw shit, I ain't got no wings CJ! This car is flying!
• We're upside-down!

Ballas

• I'll shoot everybody in this bitch!
• Hey you better be watching yourself fool!
• Can't anybody ride like us?
• Hey dude don't bang, he perpetrate!
• Hey man cover my back!
• Don't make me get out of this car!
• Man, I break no rule!
• Aw shit!
• Watch it fool!
• Don't roll to my hood! You know nobody rolls in my hood!
• Everybody duck down!
• Hey the season is over now!
• Hey the game is over now busta!
• Hey baby! Hey baby!
• Hey man, don't look at me like that!
• Oh you just gonna do it like that huh?
• Hey get your hands off me!
• Hey man, back off me fool!
• I was straight down fool!
• I'm a catch you fool!
• Hey car-jack mart! Hit the bitch!
• Hey, let's frush these busters!
• Why you gotta do that?
• Say man, gimme all your moonlight now!
• Get down man I see you. You can run but you can't hide!
• Man, fuck that bitch warren!
• Hey it's on now!
• Hey good looking man!
• Hey taxi! Slow up fool!
• Hey taxi! I need some love!
• Hey man this is a B-ride, you got a ticket?
• You need to take that back on the other side now!
• We is law abiding citizens!
• Another wasted fool.
• Damn C.R.A.S.H. always around the hood.
• Give me some real shit man. What's happening man?
• You're too close. Give me 5 feet man.
• I'm big when I'm sitting on my wallet.

Fighting/Shooting

• Don't let my stature fool you!
• Imma tear you up!
• Catch his ass Ballas!
• There he is! There he is!!
• His tyres! Shoot his tyres!!
• Fuck this shit, I'm a hero around this motherfucker!
• Imma be a hero on this one, dog!
• Watch out. Imma be the hero today!
• I'm going in!
• Everybody move in!
• Hey yo, stop that fool!
• Move forward, Ballas. Move forward!
• We'll beat you with a few more!
• Man, got a chicken up his ass!
• Represent yourself chickenboy!
• Cover me homie, I'm going in!
• Somebody trip that motherfucker!
• I've got them pinned down!
• Imma rush in now, I've got this little bitch!
• That's him right there!
• I told you Grove Street was busters!
• Run, motherfucker, Run!
• Get back here and fight, bitch!
• Show me that you're a man!
• Blast 'em Grove Street punks!
• What's up, Grove Street!?
• That's Grove Street over there! Catch him!
• I've got this mark, don't worry about it.
• Slow down.
• He can't move.
• Hey where you going? I wanna be friends!
• Hey where you going? Come back here!
• Put some cover on me. Watch my back!
• Come back here you lil' buster!
• I love my hood!
• Got this fool covered. Go ahead rush in!
• Roll him up. I've got your back.
• I've got you back. I'm dumpin' on this fool!
• Ballas will get you!
• Ballas and Grove. Let's go at it!
• Come back! Get that motherfucker!
• Step on up, motherfucker!
• Beat it!
• Screw you!
• Say bye-bye to your teeth!
• Kill yo ass!
• Imma remove your ugly face, fool!
• This is how I use to beat yo' mama!
• Put 'em up. Put 'em up!
• I'm gonna tank 'em!
• I'm a motherfucking Balla OG!
• Take that huh! Motherfucker!
• You hit like a Grove man. I thought you had something!

Seeing CJ on their turf

• Grove Street Families suck ass!
• Grove Street mamas suck my dick!
• Grove wear snitch jacket!
• Suck my dick Grove bitch!
• Grove Street are slippin' man!
• Look at those Grove Street fools!

Asking CJ

• Hey, transformer?
• State your click!
• What's your team?
• What's your colors?
• Where's your flag, man?
• You got a click?
• You from around here?
• Step up, lil' g?
• Who you claimin'?
• Who you kicked for?
• Who you down with?
• You bangin' fool?
• Where you from, homie?
• Where you from, fool?
• Where you from, punk?
• Where you from? Speak up!
• Where you from? We're killers over here.
• Where you from and be careful what you say!
• What's your gang, homie?
• Which set you claiming?
• Which set you claiming, youngster?
• Which set you from, fool?
• Which hood you representing?
• Oh you're from the backside?
• You know, I've never seen you before?
• Do I know you from somewhere, homeboy?
• Hey fool, you bangin'?
• Hey fool, do you gangbang or what?
• Hey fool, where you from?
• Hey witty, you bangin'?
• Hey homie, where you from?
• Hey hardman, where you from?
• You look like a gangbanger homie?
• It looked like you're bangin' to me?
• I'm an OG Balla cuck?
• I'm a Balla homie. Are you?
• Hey man, we victorious!
• What hood you ridin' for killah?
• Say man, what hood you're from?
• We're the notorious Ballas fool?
• Yeah Balla 4 Life. What about you?
• You're on the wrong side, homeboy?
• Wrong color, wrong block?
• Wrong hood?

San Fierro Triads

• Fuckhead!
• Muttonchops!
• So Sorry.
• Hey!
• Don't get too close to big money.
• Get away from me.

Driving

• Do we have to torture you?
• Did your brain just stop working?
• You got brain freeze or something?
• Out the way, mutton-head!
• Off the road, idiot!

Fighting

• Damn mutton-fool
• Your children are going to miss you!
• We're gonna cut you up!
• We're gonna slice you up!
• We're gonna slice your face off!
• You goin' down, fuckhead.

Criticizing CJ's apparel

• Have you got the red eye disease?

Shooting

• Keep his damn head down!
• Gimme a clip on this motherfucker!
• Hope you liked your face!

Da Nang Boys

• How's it goin'?
• Watch it! (bumping into someone)
• I need a hit of your shit.
• Hello, fine lady! (to female pedestrians)
• You like my noodle? (to female pedestrians)
• Hello, sexy honey! (to female pedestrians)
• Hello, like shopping? (to female pedestrians)
• Oh yeah, baby! (to female pedestrians)
• Gimme some more of that! (to female pedestrians)
• Hey, dude.
• Oh, shit now I hungry! (after smoking a joint)
• You always drink good shit.
• Hey, brother!
• American girl talk too much.
• I gonna go Canada.
• Tastes good, remind me of prison.
• This your wallet? (bumping into someone)
• You want me to shoot you? (when stuck in traffic)
• I studied astrology in prison.

Telling CJ to leave their turf

• What is this shit, who are you?
• Someone drop you off here, girlfriend?
• You wanna be a gangsta?
• You got to be from L.S.
• L.S bastards smell like you!

Commenting on CJ's apparel

• Nice pants, man.
• Those are ugly shoes!
• Where you get your super shoes?
• Why you wear so funny shoes?
• I shit on your car!
• My dad had a cool shirt like that.
• I want a car like that someday!
• You need new clothes!
• You look like homeless.

Fighting

• No more playing!
• Who taught you how to fight?
• I gonna kill you!
• Oh, I love fighting!
• You dead now!
• You wanna fight prison style?
• You end up in my dinner, chicken!
• Run while you can!
• Cover me!

Clerks

Ammu-Nation

• Everything a patriot could want!
• If you want to ice your wife or stop a truck, I got what you need.
• They, uh, all lost their serial numbers.
• I don't do big military orders.
• You hard yet?
• If the cops ask, you didn't get a deal, ok?
• I didn't sell you this, right?
• Have fun!
• Hope you kick some ass!
• The choice of a professional.
• All top-quality pieces!
• See ya again soon!
• All virtually legal and above board.
• Don't you just love the smell of gun oil?
• I can meet all your home defense needs.
• I have a piece for every occasion.
• Guns and ammo. All top-quality.
• No ID required, friend.
• Everything you need to get even!
• I got everything a real patriot could want.
• Ain't my business what you do with it.
• You can legally own a gun.
• It's all fresh outta the crate.
• Works well in a crowded area.
• The revolution is coming!
• There are cultists everywhere, friend.
• The wars are coming, you hear?

The Well Stacked Pizza Co.

• What do you want?
• Chewy crust or sweaty crust, your choice sir!
• Oh? Uh, what would you like?
• What would sir like?
• Everything's well stacked, sir.
• Have a combination of cheese and fat, sir.
• Here you go, enjoy!
• We're out of napkins.
• We stack 'em high, sir!
• Here! Next!
• Nice n' cheesy does it!
• Enjoy your meal, sir!
• Have a well stacked day!
• Careful, it's hot!
• Kifflom gets a discount here.
• Come on, just pick something!
• What would you like, sir?
• You want a pizza or what?
• That's a nice slice of Epsilon for you!
• Fuck off, we ain't serving you!
• I ain't serving you with that attitude!
• You're joking, right? Get outta here! (When CJ is throwing up or when he doesn't have enough money)

Cluckin' Bell

• Yummy doodle-doo, how may I serve you?
• Cock-a-doodle-cluck, welcome.
• Cock-a-doodle-doo, what do you want?
• Cock-a-cluckle-doo, please place an order.
• Cluck, cluck, how may I serve you?
• Enjoy a-doodle-doo!
• Cluckity fuck, please place an order.
• It's all processed chicken ass.
• How may I further degrade myself sir?
• Well, aloh-a-doodle-doo.
• Don't choke on the bone fragments.
• Hope you choke a doodle-doo!
• The chewy bits aren't harmful, sir.
• You might be lucky to find a feather.
• If you come back; you're a moron.
• Get out of here, you're embarassing yourself!
• Get outta here! (When CJ is throwing up or when he doesn't have enough money)
• Believe me, you've got better shit to do! (When CJ is throwing up or when he doesn't have enough money)

Burger Shot

• What may sir desire?
• I am very proud to welcome you to Burger Shot!
• What would you like sir?
• Which delicious meal would sir like?
• How may I serve you?
• I enjoy serving you sir.

Serving food

• Please enjoy your meal.
• Hope we see you again, sir!
• Slurp! My burger, sir!
• I've enjoyed serving you, sir!
• Munch all the way to bliss, sir!
• Have a wonderful day!
• I hope you're being self-conspicuous of yourself sir! (when causing trouble)
• Please leave, sir! (when causing trouble)
• Sir, I can't serve you.
• Do come back again!
• Please enjoy your meal!

When freaked out

• We cannot serve the mentally-deficient, sir!
• I hope you're being self-conspicuous of yourself, sir!
• Please leave, sir!
• Sir, I can't serve you.

Clothing shops

Female

• Try our clothes in the changing room!

When CJ enters the shop

• It's exhillerating to have you here, sir.
• Welcome to my humble shop!
• Ooh! A customer!
• Come in, come in!
• Hello!
• Hey, hi, welcome!
• Hi there!
• Welcome, sir, welcome!

After CJ purchases a product

• Thank you, sir!
• Good choice, sir!
• Always the pleasure, sir!

If CJ attacks or aims a weapon at the cashier

• I'm calling the police!
• Get out of here, you maniac!

When CJ leaves the shop

• Have a nice day, sir!

Male

• Well hello, gorgeous!
• Have a nice day, honeybum!
• It looks great on you.
• We also have a wide selection of thongs.

Trainers and masters

Los Santos boxing trainer

• Yo, you wanna learn some new moves?
• Man you're an embarassment! Get yourself some muscles first! (when CJ has low muscle or is skinny.)
• Fine man, but the streets are mean dude!
• Alright, but I'll know you'll be back!
• Hey, you wanna go on a round with me?
• You charge at him and batter your opponent!
• (to the boxers) That's right, keep breathing!
• Don't give the opponent the time to recover.

San Fierro kung fu master

• So, you wish to become a warrior!
• You are weak like flat weed! Get yourself some strength! (when CJ has low muscle or is skinny.)
• Observe with the eyes, young student, and you will learn!
• The warrior's path shall bring you back!
• Would you like to spar with your master?

Las Venturas streetfighting teacher

• You want to see some new moves?
• Come back if you change your mind, man!
• Alright man, pay attention!
• Want to have another round with me?

Pedestrians

Indian pedestrian

• (farts) My ass is stinking!
• Shit cock bastard head!
• Smell my fingers!
• You fucking shitface!
• Aeyyy!
• I kill you!
• Dumb bastard!
• You shit!
• I'll get you!
• Take this, you dick!
• You want some of this?
• I studied martial arts in Kathmandu!

Croupier

• Place your bets!
• Place your bets, ladies and gentlemen!
• An offer of credit has been made, Sir.
• The house is prepared to offer you credit, Sir.
• The house regonizes _ credit rating.
• Sorry, Sir, you don't have enough funds.
• No more bets, please!
• No more bets, ladies and gentlemen, please.
• No more bets, people.
• You win!
• You win, Sir, well done.
• Congratulations, Sir.
• Thank you, Sir, have a nice day.
• Thank you for playing, Sir.
• Jackpot!
• Another win for Sir!
• Blackjack!
• Blackjack! House Exclusive!

Samoan pedestrian

• Get out of the way!
• Move that piece of shit!
• Komo. (Asshole)
• Shit! I'll kill you!
• Ufa. (Fuck you)
• You better move!
• Shit! Come on, watch it!
• Polo (Balls). Kae (Shit). Komo (Asshole).
• Easy!
• Stay back asshole!
• What the...
• You better not do that again.
• Man, you crazy?
• Watch out!
• A last guy challenged me as a quadrapalegic.
• Last time I arm wrestle someone, I ripped his arm off.
• This fresh record from Verona Beach was still hoes!
• Ain't no cops holding me down.
• Cops are such pussies.
• Momos (Shits) with guns. Anyone wants to take me out here, I can fight anybody anytime.
• Man, where did you get your fit. The thrift store?
• Man, you're asking for trouble with that outfit.
• I wouldn't walk around looking like that man.
• You better look out for the fashion popos.
• Another working pillow for the hood.
• Man you need to hit the gym.
• Man you have to lay off the fast food.
• Man don't you give a shit about yourself?
• Shower's over this way komo (asshole).
• Hey komo (asshole) take a shower.
• Hey man take a shower, man you stink.
• Hey don't walk away from me pukio (asshole), I'm talking to you.
• What, you didn't answer? You didn't hear me?
• Man you got some style, that's pussy mega style there.
• Stylin' bro.
• Looking good bro.
• Hey homie, looking good.
• Hey homie, you've been hitting the weights?
• Hey man, you've been hitting iron?
• Sweet colombus, that is fresh. Some dope ass clothe.
• Where did you get that clothe? Is that Renegade you're wearin'?
• Shit! No! Damn! My bike!
• You better run now!
• Polo lou Kama (Your father's balls), I'm gonna kick your ass for this!
• Man, you're dead.
• How are you going to pay for my car?!
• Now you going to have to pay for my car!
• Kae! (Shit!) Komo! (Asshole!) Ufa! (Fuck you!) You're dead!
• Look out!
• Damn! Oh shit!
• Man, hook me up with a bag. Make it two bags, I'm under a lot of stress.
• Holy moly, you're dead, komo (asshole!)!
• You ain't got a chance!
• You trying to check me on, pukio (asshole?)?
• Game over, pukio! (asshole!)
• Man, this is your funeral, pukio! (asshole!)
• You like hospitals? You must like hospitals!

Purple 31 pedestrian

• Fool are you on sherms?
• You bitch-made busta!
• I mess with girls and guys, so?
• Im about to start trippin'!
• Get yo stupid ass movin'!
• I drink all your booze under the table!
• Move, punk bitch!
• Those fool oughta get blasted!
• I gotta check this mark!
• Who's this busta ass mark?!
• Excuse me mark!
• When I slap you, don't trip!
• I love violence!
• On our first date, we should go to Ammu-Nation!
• Fool, I said raise up!
• I love lip gloss! And break you off a tip!
• Better you than me!
• Well he say he's taking me to Ventura.
• You up in here smell bangin'.
• Jackin' bitches, that's yo M.O.?!
• I'm startin' to feel a little faded.
• A bitch ain't got time for this shit!
• Tryin' to fill a bitch up?!
• Man that's just triffling!
• 'Gon bail in a wheelchair when I'm done!
• Don't hold back me though, loc!
• I done KO Meteor Man! (?)
• I'm down for my hood!
• You 'bout to get beat by a bitch!
• Think a female can't squab, loc?
• Get 'em up, you perpetrator!
• Let's scrap, you old busta!
• East Santos bitches can't see me!

Mexican prostitute

• I had porn for breakfast.
• Shit on a shingle!
• MOVE THAT PIECE OF SHIT!
• Do you like Japanese school girls?
• Do you like Bangkok?
• Take a shower ese.
• Holy macaroni!
• Big gun pencil dick sabes!
• Molest you later!
• What comes with the aftertaste of poosy?
• The ladies like to rub the tatas on your tats moreno.
• You think you have the bolas for me borardo.
• Goddamn piss swimmer!
• You smell like my ass man!
• You drive like a muher!
• I buy a round for all the boys!
• Bende hamas!
• MOVE IT! Le's go!
• Cabrone!
• Que paso loco.
• Pussies are like porridge.
• You smell like pasulo!
• Carre I hate this weather.
• You better not walk away from me, puto!
• Nice ink!
• Ah! The boobies are out today!
• Pendejo (Berk), that was my car!
• Chale!
• Paboso!
• Shit! My finger! AHH!!
• I need some smoke, I need to get whacked!
• Have you got some whack-whack!
• Game over, pendejo! (berk!)
• Get off me pendejo! (berk!)
• What you doing man?!
• HEY! My porno's in there!!
• You better hope I don't find you!!
• Hey! Nobody takes away my porn!!
• Hey! I want my money! That's for the big show!
• Chale! No way!
• Forget it man!
• Hey there, chula!
• Shit, I was gonna get some pussy!
• Pussy's great for Ammu-Nation!
• I love the cock. I love the Zebra bar.
• Paboso cabbie!
• Keep going man. I want that cabucha!
• Carifa!
• You got big bolas! Keep the change!
• You like young girls too?!
• You think you got the huevos (balls) for me?
• You ready, joto? (faggot?)
• You want some of me, maricon? (faggot?)
• Mariposa! (Faggot!)
• Aqui estoy (I'm here), shit muncher!
• You gonna die now, pendejo! (punk!)
• Time's up, amorcita! (faggot!)
• You're going down, joto! (faggot!)
• I'm gonna fill you up!]

Refined pedestrian

• You smell like shit sir.
• Who cut the cheese?
• You smell like Copenhagen.
• My old tailor is in a box at home.
• Whoopsie daisy!
• Might I sniff you again, sir?
• Excuse me! Your vehicle seems to be in the way!
• You are creating an incident!
• You are not moving when you should be!
• Please forgive me!
• No broken bones!
• Quality tailoring makes the man!
• Trust funds for everyone!
• This weather is dissapointing.
• I love to travel! France is so lovely!
• A tattoo is for heathens.
• You smell exquisite.
• You remind me of spring!
• Tattoos remind me of my service day.
• What do you think you're doing?!
• I'm on my way to the symphony!
• Maniac!
• Menace!
• You're sick! You're dangerous!
• I need something to keep me polite.
• Your devotion to fitness is admirable.
• I would like to get stoned.
• Oh my! Please be more gentle!
• Take more money for petrol!
• I'll call the constable!
• This property isn't yours!
• You want a donation?
• You fool!
• Greetings sir, how do you do sir?
• Do you enjoy the programme "law"?
• I find Ammu-Nation supplies me well.
• You are a gentleman and a scholar.
• Perhaps in another colour, this supports my purposes.
• Chauffeur! Taxi!
• Let's hit the road!
• With haste, young man!
• Now hurry, and off the way we go!
• The stickiest of the icky please.
• My motorised penny farthing!
• Oh dear.
• Poor swine!
• Your finest narcotics please.
• That's the way the cookie crumbles!
• If you excuse me: I must ask for my vehicle back!
• Yes! Truly unfortunate!
• Absolutely not!
• How do you madam?
• Enjoy yourself sir!
• Sprunk taste like dirt.
• Oh my word, no.
• Public transportation is rubbish!
• You sir are a menace!
• I regret stepping into this contrivance!
• My blind wolfhound drives better than you!
• Oh my goodness!
• Did you notice that person?!
• You've killed the poor person!
• My solicitor has been informed! I shall alert the authorities!
• Violence is a last resort.
• You have forced me into action!
• Regrettable, but necessary.
• Reason, obviously won't work here.
• There's only one way to solve this.
• I am prepared to fillet you!
• You have forfeited the rules of fair play.
• I can scrap!

DJ

• Everyone is tryin' to rip me off.
• Come on man!
• I got places I wanna be!
• No way homie, I'm on to you.
• Nice to meet you.
• Hey when you back up, the people say beep!
• My two-wheeled baby!
• When they set up a needle, you set up a production sequel.
• I should get big muscles like yours!
• Pencil dick asshole!
• Corporate gangsta!
• Oh you can take it, I need all the the insurance money.
• Stop rhymin' and start runnin'!
• What?! Stop what are you doing?! My recs are in there!
• I'm a kill you now!
• Yeah, you be sorry now!
• Holy remix!
• Bless my diamond stylus!
• Street means body armour!
• Hey! Hey! This car is also my home!
• Homey, I ain't afraid of your major label bullshit.
• Great spinnin' 2 inches!
• These city streets ain't safe!
• Stop! That's my house! Uh, I mean my car!
• When I get famous, you'll be sorry!
• Didn't you realise I'm the prince of the dicks?
• Pick it up baby bop, come on!
• Aw, you got some nice moves there!
• No homie, you can keep the change!
• Oh no! My house! I mean my car!
• Be careful, this car is also my home.
• Gon' get my music over my dead body! (?)
• Nobody tries to steal my music!
• Oh, you wanna die? Sure!
• My fists are as strong as my beats!
• You want beats? I give you beats!
• Yeah, you got one foot in the grave already!
• Give it up, shithead!

Old bathroom pedestrian/hotdog vendor

• World of Cog has the best toilet paper!
• AH! MY LAWN! MY HEART! MY EYES!
• Hurry it up! I wanna take a leak!!
• Not now! I wanna take a dump!
• GET THE HELL OUTTA HERE!
• GET THAT PIECE OF GARBAGE OUTTA HERE!
• MOVE! You're between me and the john!
• All I want to do today is sit on the john.
• Your girl's got no nose!
• You gotta wipe your ass too, youngster!
• SHIT ON A STICK!!
• Show some respect dummy!
• Get off the road, I wanna take a piss!
• Uuuugh... my heart!
• Johnson respect, dummy!
• This street is too small!
• What?! Yo shit don't stink.
• Crack my head, crack yo head!
• You be careful now.
• What in damnation is going on?!
• Ain't cha got self control?!
• I soiled myself because of you!
• That car will be your coffin!!!
• I took a good dump this morning!
• You ain't gettin' away dummy!
• I can't even masturbate anymore!
• Hey! I'm an old man!
• Underwear is overated man!
• You thieving dummy!
• You goddamn dummy!
• Man, I need some tits to squeeze.
• Is your aftershave made from faeces?! (belches)
• Your cologne is very sophisticated!
• MOVE THAT BUCKET!
• The urinals in this joint smell good!
• Get that piece of garbage outta here!
• OW! What the...
• I've been to every public bathroom in the city.
• Your tattoos are giving me the runs!
• Man this weather SUCKS!
• Careful dummy!
• Cool it meathead!
• This is bullshit!!
• SHIT!!!
• LOOK OUT!! WATCH OUT!!
• AHHHHH!!! Not my time!
• I need something extra special!
• Feet don't fail me now!
• Look out! I've got a heart condition!
• Shiiiiit!
• GET BACK HERE YA THIEVING DUMMY!!
• You can't take a coffin from a old man!!
• You gotta be faster than that boy!!
• This is supposed to be a nice city!
• How's it hangin' bro?
• My ass still hurts in that Indian food.
• I love Cluckin' Bell on Tuesdays.
• Burger Shot has some quality meat.
• Damn no respect kids!!
• Let me outta here already!!
• Have you been to Rusty Brown's?
• You've reached the end of days!
• Get ready for an ass whoopin'!
• I'll eat you and spit you out!
• I'll show you how it's done!
• No tomorrow for you!
• I eat dummies for breakfast!
• You ain't even gonna have an ass to kick!
• I'm still young enough to whoop ya!
• Your time here is up!

Orange 12 pedestrian

• Come on fool. Kick me a Logger.
• I ain't no alcoholic, I'm a weed head.
• Steal one drink and a bartender starts trippin'.
• I ain't nursin' no drunk.
• Do Loggers come in a 40 ounce?
• I prefer Chronic.
• Man, stop playin' with me!
• Don't you know what road rage is?
• Honk means get the hell on, man!
• Is you high?
• You're like my asshole, always holdin' up shit.
• Move bitch!
• I'm too high for this shit, move!
• You playin' with me? Stop playin'.
• Don't push me.
• I've come to the edge, man.
• Man, don't be runnin' up on me.
• Raise up, mark.
• Can't you see I'm busy bein' high?
• All that aggression.
• You on sherms, too?
• Go smoke some cigar.
• You're Madd Doggin' me, man.
• Get your hands out my pockets!
• I'm a get me a Happy Farmer Kit.
• That esse put dust in my weed.
• I smoke cause it gives me peace of mind.
• Them white boys had me on Crystal Meth.
• Weed, money, same difference.
• Gonna shoot me over $200, man?
• I smoke cause it gives me knowledge.
• You still wearin' prison issue, man?
• You spend clothes money on crack, huh?
• It's laundry day, huh?
• You so fat, you jumped in the air and you got stuck.
• Back of your neck look like a pack of hot dogs.
• Did someone die in your mouth?
• Do you shower in do-do?
• Man, you stink.
• Why you got to be like that?
• Man, why you tryin' to fade me?
• Nice outfit, high roller.
• Came up on some nice clothes, boy.
• Can't find them threads at no swap meet.
• You swollen as shit man.
• You lift weights? I lift joints.
• Smells good, boy.
• Where can I buy your smell?
• Ya smell good, man.
• Now I got to steal another bike.
• Gimme drugs! I'll forget about the bike.
• Stolen bikes don't have no insurance.
• I'm the one supposed to drive high, not you.
• Now I got to steal another car.
• I would call the po-po.
• You got enough weed to fix this?
• I'm too high for this shit.
• Damn!
• What the hell?
• I'm movin'!
• Aw, you trippin'.
• Stay off the crack, man.
• You on one.
• Scandalous!
• Say, man, what's on special?
• I don't smoke all the time.
• I need the good shit, man! The good shit!
• Gimme the proper, man.
• I'm a lick you like Mr. Whoopee.
• I'm a soak you up like a biscuit.
• You, me, weed - what a threesome.
• Stoned with a stone cold jab.
• My heart don't pump no Sprunk.
• I'm a beat ya like you stole somethin'.
• Knockin' you out, and smokin' your money.
• I hate getting stole on.
• Another one, damn it.
• I can't loose man, hit me!
• I feel my card comin', hit me!
• Feelin' lucky, hit me!
• Come one, dealer!
• Gimme another one!
• Hit me!
• Bitch!
• Dealer, you cheatin'!
• I ain't got enough left for a sack.
• That ain't count.
• I said "Stay", not "Hit".
• Man, I'm cool, no more cards.
• This hand is righteous.
• No more, I'll ride with this hear.
• No more, dealer.
• I'll stay.
• No, I'll stay.
• Yes!
• We dealers stick together, you know.
• Man, I can't be faded, man.
• Did you think you could beat me?
• All praise due to the weed!
• Santos fools runnin' the casino, man.
• Do it again.
• I let you win that time, man.
• Hell yeah, let's go smoke and celebrate.
• Spend yo winnin's on a sack.
• We played Russain roulette.
• My P.O. don't know I left Los Santos.
• Hey, lemme borrow some of ya chips.
• Let me borrow some of ya chips.
• I got all ya'lls money!
• Did it on one coin too!
• The slots love me!
• One yank, made all that bank.
• Man, I was just playin' with ya.
• Man, stop playin', the po-po watchin'.
• Calm yo ass down.
• How you gonna draw down on your homie?
• I thought we was homies?
• This fool is trippin'!
• Man, I stole this first!
• Damn, I'm slippin'.
• Come on, man. Ain't we the same set?
• Man, you on one.
• Wait, man, the rollers is watchin'.
• I'm a civilian, man.
• How you gonna run up on me?
• Damn, you scandalous!
• Oh, busta!
• Stupid ass mark!
• My homies gonna find you!
• Bitch!
• You ain't a G!
• You know we enemies now, right?
• Yeah, boy, you better bail!
• I just got to steal another one. Shit.
• Why you drive off, mark!
• Man, I will kick your ass! You hear me?
• Forget you! I'm a go smoke.
• Fine!
• Fine! You can't have none of my endo.
• Why you trippin', man?
• I just stole this money from ya mamma!
• You just gonna smoke it up.
• Hold up, man, the rollers is watchin'.
• Yeah, but I can't fade it, man.
• Fo sho.
• That's some mark ass shit.
• The bomb, man.
• Oh, that's right!
• And it's tight, man!
• Nah, but it's crackin' though, huh?
• Not yet, man
• Nah, man, nah.
• Oh, no.
• Man, you blowin' my high.
• Get out my face, trick.
• Hey little mamma.
• What's poppin'.
• Hey, baby, you don't remember me, do you?
• Hey, man, where the weed at?
• What's happenin', homeboy?
• What's up dog?
• Call me with some Chronic, aight?
• Later!
• I gotta bail, in a minute.
• Later homie.
• Lemme go find some Chronic. Later.
• You know about that Happy Farmer Kit?
• You been to Sha-La's yet?
• Ever smoke weed from San Fierro?
• You tried that grub at Cluckin' Bell yet?
• Hey, you visit that Blotto shop?
• Some fat sherm is makin' me tweak.
• Weed spot is dry as hell man.
• Man, I've got some Northern Lights, straight from Canada.
• Got me nice and sprung!
• I ain't feelin' nothin'.
• A second chance at life?
• That shit look painful.
• Do it hurt?
• Walk it off!
• Well your draws don't smell too bad.
• I dun spent all my duckets on weed.
• Damn! This is the bomb!
• Should I buy a dub, or should I buy this?
• I can't fade this, man.
• How much is this shit again?
• Can I pay for this with bud?
• I can refund this tomorrow, right?
• Yeah, my money smell like weed, so!?
• You know I'm about to kick your ass, right?
• Come on fool, get off!
• Stop that shit!
• You're ruinin' my high, man!
• I ain't got no money!
• How about I pay you Saturday mornin'?
• You drive like you on drugs.
• I know you can see me!
• Taxi!
• You got ran the hell over!
• Scrooch over, let me hit someone too.
• Forget drive-by's. You drive over!
• Take me to the drugs, pronto!
• I got to pay you in bud.
• Drive! I'm clockin' here!
• Thanks, man!
• I'm a go get high now.
• Righteous!
• If I ever need speed for weed, you the one.
• Here's some extra, go on, get high.
• Extra chump change for some Cheeba.
• Am I high, or did we switch drivers?
• That's my dealer you jacked, man!
• Say, drop me off at the weed spot.
• That Chronic got me, man.
• Man, why you want to steal this bucket anyway?
• Now how will my dealer do the drop off?

Quantum Man

• When will you villains learn?
• Taste the sweet anvils that are my fists.
• If you give me money, I'll give a super blowjob.
• I forgot to sew pockets on my tights.
• Quantum Man can be your drinking buddy!
• My superhearing has detected an emergency!
• You villains never learn!
• Oh! That tickles! Taste my wrath!
• You dare to aim at citizens?!
• Quantum Man never shrinks from battle!
• Must...catch...bullets!
• Stop! In the name of justice!
• I have no choice but to agree.
• Agreed, good citizen!
• SILENCE! Evil one! Your deeds has come to an end!
• Be vigilant!
• Why thank you good citizen!
• I only use my powers against supervillains.
• Hello good citizen!
• You are risking everything in combat!
• I have powerful thighs.
• My super-speed is no match for you!
• You dare aim at Quantum Man?!
• Panic not good citizens! FLEE!
• I dare you to immobilize that firearm!
• This planet is insane!
• I am Quantum Man, I have come to the universe to protect the innocent!
• Hello female citizen!
• Hello sir!
• Have you seen the regular reaction?
• Glory thee to this powerful moment!
• In the name of subnotomic!
• On my world, I was known as a bum.
• STOP! In the name of justice!
• There is no reasoning with people!
• I must agree with the gravity of this universe.
• My compliments good lady.
• Please excuse me citizen.
• I must return to crime patrol. My duty calls.
• Hello there sir!
• Dark forces are gathering here.
• Your timing was inplecible.
• Do you know what you've done?!

African-American hippie

• Fight the power, brother!
• Let's be peaceful, brother!
• They don't want us expanding our minds.
• Relax! I'm only pulling out my wallet!
• Brother I have no beef with you.
• You see a black man trying to drive?
• I believe I have a right to self-defence.
• I know who you are pig!
• I'm gonna beat the Uncle Tom outta you!
• You gonna do drive by Uncle Tom?
• Always a sellout pulling a trigger!
• I'm late for Dr.Ackbar's knowledge.
• Stop harassing me 5-0!
• Get a good life snitch!
• I like message reps!
• Jack Howardson making pigs look cool!
• Don't eat to die brother! EAT TO LIVE!
• Clean the lies from your lives!
• The revolution needs brothers like you!
• Capitalism breeds accidents!
• Capitalism breeds car crashes!
• Legalise it and we'll advertise it!
• My people love it.
• You need to be corrected brother!
• Please brother! Stop the violence!
• Unhand me you sellout!
• Thieving Uncle Tom!
• Brainwashed bastard!
• Of course but I won't discuss it openly!
• Kiss my ass snitch!
• Traitor!
• Beware the beast sister!
• Beware the beast brother!
• Crack dealers destroy our community!
• The New World Order has enslaved our people!
• My fine African garments!
• Your driving lacks street knowledge!
• Stay in the driving seat brother!
• Now we're both victims of capitalism!
• Those garments are attrocious brother.
• Look at that strong black brother, now that's an fine African warrior!
• Brothers in the drivers seats intimidate you?!
• You're acting kinda strange.
• Violence breeds more violence fool!
• You're too old for the man!
• Rejecting messager, but consisting the message.
• No more crime please uncle brother!
• I only deal with revolutionaries.
• Heard much about the New World Order?
• Capitalism breeds violent deaths!
• You know anything about the crack conspiracy?
• Too strong and too black to die!
• Look at that! They're hatin' me!
• The revolution is coming, I'm wearing my best African garments.
• The ancestors sent me back!
• San Fierro is waking up to the truth!
• TAXI!
• You're not a government agent are you?
• Jacking cars is what they want you to do!

Kifflom backpacker

• Kifflom, brother uncle!
• Are you looking for spiritual answers?
• Kifflom! Kifflom!
• Can I interest you in religion?
• Dinosaurs are a lie! FACT!
• Cris Formage saved my life!
• Epsilon protect me!!
• Put me up brother uncle!
• Something big is happening in American religion.
• You should read our literature!
• Can I talk to you about religion?
• Kifflom! Kifflom be praised!!
• Don't corrupt me! I'm saved!
• Kifflom and Krant!
• Before I read the tract, I was lost.
• Careful, brother uncle.
• Careful, careful.
• Do you need spiritual guidance?
• Find out!
• Have you ever taken a karate lesson for free?
• Have you thought about the answers to the universe?
• I bring a message of peace.
• I haven't been with my parents since I've joined the fellowship.
• I haven't spoke to my parents since...
• I lie with nine of my sisters every week.
• Join our fellowship.
• No, it's a terrible lie.
• Kifflom! Krant! Help!
• On the road take care in the woods of darkness.
• Partner sharing is a integrated part of Cris's vision.
• The world's beautiful, and so are you.
• Yes, it's all thanks to epsilonism.
• They should all read the Epsilon tract.
• Kifflom, sister aunt!
• Have you read the Epsilon tract?
• Biology is a LIE!
• I love the sexual side of Epsilonism!
• Epsilonism doesn't allow this!!

Construction worker

• Out of the way, man!
• Hurry up, I gotta get to the site!
• Come on, I got work to do!
• Move it, asshole!
• Buy American, you piece of shit!
• I don't got all day here!
• Move it or lose it, moron!
• This ain't a parking lot, asshole!
• I'm gonna be late for my bowling league!
• What's your problem, pal?
• Got some sort of disorder, buddy?
• Tourettes, huh?
• Watch where you're walking, moron!
• You want me to shoot you with my nailgun?
• Yeah, just try that again.
• Do you want a black eye?
• Easy!
• Hey!
• Watch it!
• You in a rush?
• You pushin' me, buddy?
• What's your problem, buddy?
• My bowling team's in first place.
• Foreman takes all the credit.
• Got this new table saw.
• Bowling is such an intellectual game.
• Fell off the scaffolding last week.
• I wouldn't even wear that on the site!
• You look like shit!
• What the hell are you wearing?
• Who paid you to wear those clothes?
• Woah, fatty!
• You're gonna give yourself a heart attack!
• My god, you sure are fat!
• You are a fat bastard!
• Dude! Take a shower!
• Try some deodorant, buddy!
• And I thought I smelled bad!
• My god, you stink!
• Very flashy!
• You sure know how to dress!
• I like those clothes!
• You must be in construction too, huh!
• Gee, I wouldn't mess with you!
• You a trainer or something?
• Nice cologne, bro!
• Bet you get a lot of ladies with that cologne!
• Maybe I should try that cologne!
• I wish I smelled that good!
• You been to that new 24/7?
• You tried using a belt cinder?
• You ever do it yourself?
• Have you checked out that new Willard dealership?
• Have you ever tried bowling?
• I oughta kick your ass!
• Bring it on, buddy!
• Yeah, this's gonna be fun!
• I'm gonna mess you up!
• I needed a release all day!
• Come on, asshole!
• Let's see what you got, douchebag!
• Go ahead, make me hurt!

Ex-convict thug

• Why you touchin' my beer?
• Don't make me kick your ass!
• You can take me - I like it better in jail anyway(!)
• You know who I am chump?
• Raise up little bitch!
• You wanna die little bitch?
• Raise up little bitch.
• In the pen, we play strip football.
• I'm a Rusty Brown doughnut eatin' gangsta!
• Nice wheels for a chump.
• I'm taking bike repairs out your ass!
• I'm taking car repairs out your ass!
• I'm taking repairs out your ass!
• I'm too big for little sales, sir!
• Watch out, punk!
• Stupid mark!
• This shit better be good, punk.
• In jail, being on top ain't gay.
• You're a sissy with a silly ass car.
• Don't make me repeat myself! Move!
• Nice car asshole!
• Is that yo mama's car?
• That is one ugly ass car!
• I made a fool drink piss.
• Those steroids make your dick do WHAT?
• I just stole that bike too!
• I just stole that car too!
• I just stole this thing too, I hope yo mama's a mechanic!
• I like that car little bitch.
• Please sir! I'll be a good little thug!
• Who pulls me out of my car?!
• You sneaky punk! It's your funeral!
• Big mistake, bitch!
• It's your funeral, chump!
• This is my vehicle, punk!
• Run if you want to live mark!
• Show some respect, punk!
• That dead body made my day.
• Jackin' my homie? I should jack you!
• Taxi! Bring yo ass over here!
• I'm a make you wash my drawers!
• Bail before I make your heart fail.
• I'm a give that fat ass a spanky!
• Smoke, sterm, steroids give it here.
• This shit better be good punk, any bad tricks I'll kill you.
• Damn I missed out on all the fun!
• Another 187 haha!
• This murder put me in the mood!
• It's on now, lil' man!
• I love squabblin'!
• It's lights out for you, chump!
• I'ma make you wash my drawers!
• You must wanna die, lil' man!
• I kill you wit' my bare hands!
• Come get knocked out like yo' mama!
• You wanna scrap wit' a killa', fool?
• You boxin' wit' a booty bandit, punk!
• Let's work up a sweat, lil' man!
• Yeah, let's go head up!
• Time for a donation, chump.
• Fool, you jackin' a straight killa!

Bikini woman

• Get your fat body off the beach.
• You smell like shit.
• I'm special, asshole!
• Wow, you smell hot!
• My thong, asshole!
• Go pick somebody fat instead!
• Look at that guy!
• Hey you, you looking good!
• Nooooo! My hair!!
• You can't shoot me!! I'm American!!
• Hey fatty!
• Hey porky!
• Hey lardy!
• I'm fighting the war on fat.
• Get the hell out of my shadow.
• Good luck losing the weight.
• Stop staring at me!!
• I'm not broken, am I?
• Stop it you asshole!
• Go hit a fat person!
• Screw you dick!
• I thank God for not making me fat.
• Stop molesting me!
• You are disgustingly fat!!

Mohawk punk

• He got nothing on me!
• Hey this is bullshit! Where are the charges?
• Man, get out of the way!
• OUT OF THE WAY!
• Something's gonna be very wrong with you!
• Everyone knows me at the casinos!
• You call that a car?
• Yo, yo, yo, yo!
• That tattoo is FIERCE!!
• OPEN YOUR EYES MAN!!
• Man, I got this detailed!
• Damn idiot!
• Nooooooooo!!
• What are you retarded?!
• Can we just talk this out!
• WA-HA-HO!!!
• AAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!
• I was done dealin' with diapers, I'm gonna kick your ass!
• Oh what do you think you're doing?!
• Oh this is not cool man!
• You got no witnesses?
• You wanna see a trick pal?
• What are you, some kind of joker?
• Hey watch your shoes man!
• Man I just invented this trick!
• You wanna bet on that?
• What's the matter with you?
• Unlike you I got somewhere to be!
• Man some people...!
• Come on man, let's beat the phones!
• Ho ho, I'm feelin' lucky today!
• Man, that is a rolling disaster!
• Nice car pal!
• Now that car is cool!
• BLIND OR SOMETHING?!!
• Hey LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO MY BIKE!!
• Oh you're blind as a bat!
• Oh what did you do?!
• OOOHH!!!
• You call that driving?!
• AAAHHH!!!
• You better not screw me man, I need some of that stuff.
• Man, I hope you like knuckle sandwiches!
• Oh watch where you point that!
• Oh this is not working out!
• I won't have any insurance!!!
• MAN I JUST STOLE THAT CAR BACK!!!
• GIMME THAT!!
• I need this more than you do!
• Awesome!
• N.O.!
• Go fly a kite!
• Forget you!
• Have you played craps?
• Yo, the police are hassling me all the time!
• I don't believe this!
• Look at the tag on that!
• Hey TAXI!!!
• HEY WATCH OUT MAN!!! OH GOD!!!!
• HEY THIS AIN'T DRIVING MAN!! THIS IS HUNTING!!
• Have you driven a Hustler?
• I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!
• I'm gonna crush your skull man!
• You ever gamble!
• Man, I'm banned from three casinos!
• Man looks better on the windows!
• UH!! I'M GONNA DIE MAN!!!
• Playin' cards are gonna make me a millionairre!

"Old Cletus" vagrant

• What do you mean I can't use the bathroom? I gotta take my personal business somewhere.
• Hey, you need a bodyguard player. I can protect anyone around here.
• Something died in my underpants.
• I once had a dream, but it died in San Andreas.
• Two words for your gun: "Screw" and "you"!
• When I find that chihuahua, I'm gonna kill it!
• Have you ever been to that Glory Hole Theme Park?
• I was world heavyweight champion in 68.
• I had crabs the size of a baseball.
• The liverwurst was green, but I ate it anyway.
• Now you got the cooties, jackass!
• You ever suck the fudge of a Rusty Brown's ring doughnut?
• I shouldn't have eaten that taco...
• Tag! You're it!
• I hate this place.
• Woof! Woof!
• Excuse moi asshole!
• Has anyone seen my lizard?
• I can't masturbate anymore.
• When will I find true love...
• Jumping Jehosophat! I'm not ready to die!
• Are you, go ahead shoot me!
• OK, OK, don't shoot me.
• You mugging me? Do I look like your daddy to you?
• Hello there missy!
• Good day, sweetheart!
• Have you sniffed that icky-icky?
• Burger Shot burgers are tasty, even in the dumpster!
• My stomach is rumbling.

Rich Hispanic Woman

• Thinking I'm smarter than everybody I know. (talking to oneself)
• Everybody wants to be like me.
• It's so great to be rich and beautiful...
• Do I look cheap to you?
• Excuse me!?
• That's as far as you get with me.
• Get your ass back here now!
• Don't tell me you just didn't see me!
• These shoes are so expensive... (talking to oneself and being bumped into)
• Did I say you could touch me?
• I'm expecting an apology! (being bumped into)
• You better say you're sorry.
• You're lucky my man isn't here, cabron. 
• Finally, a man who knows how to dress like one. (responding positively to CJ's apparel)
• That's a fine ride! (responding positively to CJ's car)
• I wouldn't mind being seen with you!
• You look like a cheap slob!
• This area has a dress code, you know.
• Did you buy your shirt at Binco's? (responding negatively to CJ's apparel)
• You buy that at Binco's?
• You look shit!
• This is so wrong!
• Are you going to hold me up!?
• Take your ghetto shit back to Ganton! (if being carjacked)
• You best just to step off!
• Get him off me!
• Ándale! (when waiting for traffic to move)
• Chinga tu madre (fuck your mother), I ain't got time for this!
• I will not stand for this shit!
• My foot!
• Where did you get that cut!? (responding positively to CJ's haircut)
• I like a man who's not afraid to shop!
• Finally, a man who dresses like one.
• You're not worth it. (if CJ negatively replies to her compliments)
• It's the bestest! (talking to a pedestrian)
• It's the worst!
• Ever been to the block where I grew up?
• This area is really coming up!
• Have you ever driven a Pfister? (talking to other pedestrians)
• That chihuahua shit is nasty!
• I ain't interested in Herr Gruber's Spa.
• Hey chica!
• Hi cutie!
• Hey baby!
• Hey chico!
• It sucks!
• It's terrible!
• It's the worst! (responding to pedestrians)
• Bye bye, girlfriend!
• Isn't my dress cute?
• Hey! Taxi! (looking for a taxi)
• Right here's good. (being dropped off at her desired destination)
• Watch where you're going! (if nearly hit by a car)
• Gaah!
• Diva!
• Watch it!
• Whatcha!?
• That's it!
• What the---!?

Depressed Black Woman 

• I'm having a breakdown in here!
• This is just like Inversion Therapy!
• I'm CRACKING up in here!
• These things are sent to TEST us!
• You gotta get outta my way!
• MOVE!
• Please, move!
• Come on, I'm late for therapy!
• Hey, look out!
• Excuse you.
• Push a girl? Very clever.
• Do I look invisible?!
• I've got enough problems without you pushing me!
• Pushing a woman around?
• How impressive!
• Look where you're going, bully!
• The world is a terrible, terrible place.
• Guilt has ruined my life.
• Wealth has so many responsibilities.
• I just want to help people, and myself.
• Oh, I know how it is to suffer.
• The world hates people like me!
• Mr. Fontaine is a genius!
• I like shopping, and designer clothes...
• Shopping really helps my self worth!
• I blame my father...
• Those shoes... they're wonderful!
• Love the hair, m'brother.
• Those shoes are out, Mister!
• You must hate yourself in shoes like that!
• SICK bastard!
• FILTHY bastard!
• He wrecked my car! He hates me!
• Why does this always happen to me!?
• He's trying to kill me!
• Call my therapists! Any of them!
• I'm moving to Ohio!

Black Young Businesswoman

• You hit like a bitch!
• Females have got squabbles too, sucker!
• Excuse me...
• Beating up girls, right!? (if provoked)
• I firm with stunt doubles, asshole!
• You stepped on my Shodi! (bumped into)
• The studio might give me a promotion! (talking to pedestrians)

Drug dealers

Mexican

• I've seen your face officer!
• Fuck you holmes! Keep your damn hood!
• Junkies are pussies.
• These Junkies, Their pathetic!
• I sell drugs to children.
• I've been with your wife officer.
• Holmes, you need some rich man's eye? I got what you need.
• I ain't a drug dealer! I got a wife and 13 children!
• Don't look at me asshole!
• What are you looking at puto?
• I do with your wife officer!
• Who d'you think you're messing with?
• You want a little pick-me-up?
• You know this beer makes me want to piss.
• You push me, you want to die?!
• I love making junk things bad!
• Please officer! This is discrimination!
• Come back here puto!
• ASSHOLE!
• Come back and fight ese!
• I'll be back asshole!
• Who the fuck do you think you are ese?!
• I heard you the first time, fuck off!
• You're too proud ese!
• You're a pathetic junkie!
• Look at that asshole!
• I live the American Dream!
• I ain't a drug dealer! I'm a war veteran!
• I remember you! I know who you are!
• Oh no! That's real bad news!
• This is gonna be bad for business!
• If you have it, I'm gonna be your priest!
• I need some better customers.
• I know who you are, drug fiend!
• I'll see you in half an hour I guess.
• Customers are such losers.
• Have you ever heard of inflation?!

Black

• I gotta call my lawyer!
• Got some sticky-icky-icky homie!
• So this is the best shit man! Government issue!
• Ay, I rather slang than bang homie.
• Yo man! Why you stressin' me!
• Man! Damn! My ProLaps!
• Man! You should've smoked me CJ!
• Hey man, it's my block now!
• Man, you half dead CJ!
• Man, you half dead homie!
• You bitch made punk! You dead!
• Hey man, you tryin' to check me punk?!
• Now what's up bitch!
• CJ I'm gone! I'm gone!
• Hey, I didn't know this was your hood homie!
• Hey I don't want no problems Big CJ, haha.
• Nothing stopping me from coming up!
• Man, fool, I don't know you.
• Man you pushing me up or something?
• Hey man, see you later dawg. See ya later.
• Man, I ain't the one homie!
• I'm supposed to be dead dawg?!
• I should turn my life around?
• Sherm! Sherm! Get 'em sherm!
• I ain't GOTS to do a damn thing!
• What the hell you want mark?
• What da hell?!

Caucasian

• Excuse moi, asshole!
• I'm gonna cut you a new smile!
• This is shit man, and you know it!
• I'm gonna mess your ghetto ass up!
• This stuff is the shit!
• ASSHOLE!!
• Get a life!
• Get a fucking life!
• Come on man! Take the cash man! Let me go!
• Gotta cut this shit with washing powder.
• Gotta get my next shipment cut from San Fierro (3D Universe)
• I hope I'm not watching my house.
• Hey you got the wrong guy!
• Man you're deluded!
• Do you know who my dad is? I'm connected, ASSHOLE!
• Whatever sport!
• OK, I read you loud and clear.
• Okay man chill!
• Take it to someone who cares.
• Go screw a raccoon.
• This shit's weapon grade!
• Watch this stuff, its rocket fuel man!
• You want sliced?!
• You think you're something huh?!
• Oh you wanna do the "nasty dance" huh!
• I can't believe this shit!!
• I want my lawyer!

Rednecks

Bone County

• How come they don't allow donkeys in this bar?
• Adam and Eve was brother and sister.
• I'm telling you, horse is the new pork.
• I'm telling ya man cousins is legal, this is crazy!
• Move you dumb retard!
• So the donkey walks into a bar...
• Hey! I ain't got all day!
• You stinking piece of shit! MOVE!
• Next time I punch your face.
• You inbred or something, you can't see me?
• What do you mean change my socks?
• What a rustbucket!
• What a piece of shit car!
• I'm gonna get myself a monster truck!
• HEY! You look out!
• Hey! This is my pa's car!
• You damn Yankee!
• When d'you learn to drive?!
• Come on, punch me!
• He's got a gun!!
• Who the hell do you think you are?!
• HEY! Get off!
• Hey get back here! Where do you think you're going?!
• You've been messing with the wrong guy!
• I was gonna introduce you to my sister.
• Heck no. No.
• Hey I ain't got all day buddy!
• Pardon me!
• Hey come on man! Look out!
• What do you think of this here chrome shotgun?
• Ma and pa were past cousins.
• Donkey's afraid of a big fat man.
• Whoa man, you sure is fat.
• Oh you rude bastard.
• NOT MY BIKE!
• Oh geez! That was my favourite bike!
• Hey! I just stole this car!
• You're dead donkin' me buddy!
• Oh come on asshole!
• Out of my way!
• Come on! Gimme your best shot!
• Come on, I'm gonna break your nose!
• HELP! I'm being shot at!
• Beat it tough guy! I ain't afraid of ya!
• Bastard jacked me!
• Oh, ma's gonna be so mad!
• Hey that varmint son'bitch stole my car! Oh how am I going to get home?
• Oh pa's gonna whup me for this one!
• This here car's mine! So out you go boy!
• Watch your step on the way out! Hee hee!
• Hey I was just bein' friendly!
• You got something against donkeys?
• Hey leave me alone!
• Well hello there miss!
• Hello donkey lips!
• Have you ever lived in a trailer park?
• Sprunk an' scotch is my favourite drink.
• Cover your eyes donkey!
• This store is fancy!
• Oh I want me some of these!
• Oh, I think I'm gonna puke...
• Are you insane?!
• Step on it buddy, I'm in a mood.
• That was fast. Here's some change.
• My cousins are gonna get you for this!
• See ya later donkey hater!
• I'm the victim in this here situation!
• Now get the hell out!
• I was tryin' to be nice!
• Hey we was just talkin'!
• These bar stools sure are squishy.
• Hey let's get a move on!
• I'm gonna get angry!
• Pardon me.
• Hey mister!
• See ya later pretty lady!
• Have you ever raised donkeys.
• Dude, Burger Shot is disgusting.
• Lordy Lordy!
• I wonder if they got this in yellow?
• Would you ring me for this?
• Hey there!
• Hey that was cool!
• Sonny Jim, I'm in a rush!
• Good job, here's the change.
• Please mister, let me go!
• I'll never see my donkey again!
• You city folk are so rude.
• Yeah it's the Devil, oh it's disgusting, I can't bear it.
• I got no time for you man.
• See you later.
• Have you ever tried licking a Rusty Brown?
• Incest is a beautiful thing!
• I just love the countryside.
• I think you just killed that person!
• Howdy!
• I just can't bear the city.
• You seen my life! You've seen my donkey too?
• There is no way I'm payin' for that!
• Hey it's about time!
• Somebody help me! Hey, this guy's touchin' me!
• I'll let you touch me if you let me go!

Countryside

• Wow son, you're a big boy.
• Careful piggy!
• Grandpa got caught in the pig pen, I love a squealer.
• Why are you driving like that?
• Ya hit my car! What did you do that for?!
• Oh yeah! You're real funny kid!
• Go screw your own pigs! You ain't having her!
• Get away from my home!
• Howdy, partner!
• Hello she-male!
• Have you ever shot a dog?
• Inbreeding ain't so bad.
• Did piggy make it?
• This guy's insane! This must be judgement day!
• Dude, can I get out of here?
• Move it, numbnuts!
• Move!
• Move your ass!
• Come on move!
• Open your eyes, boy!
• Mama and papa are close cousins.
• Those little curly tails freak me out.
• Some peope say swine is fat.
• I love that car, is that real?
• Don't shoot! I don't wanna die!
• Keep yer dirty hands off me!
• ARGH, off! Get off me!
• You can't just carjack me!
• You ain't robbin' me piggy!
• Oh yeah?!
• Have you liked pink pigs?
• Have you shot a dog?
• I have a fat hog.
• What's money? Is that a gun? It's useless.
• Woah, hey!
• Watch it!
• You're mine, piggy!
• I cannot wait a minute!
• My mama showed me how to fight!
• I'm gonna make you real sorry!
• You're gonna regret the day you came here!

Girlfriends

Katie Zhan

• Hey Carl! (When starting a date)
• Hey ya, CJ!
• Hey CJ!
• Those Epsilon nutjobs freak me out. (talking to CJ)
• Necrophilia is too far, even for me.
• OG Loc? "OG Joke" is more like it.
• Madd Dogg is my favorite rapper.
• You should come down to the dojo more often.
• I love to work in the ER, it gives me a thrill.
• I've been a nurse for three years now!
• Oh yeah, wow! (When CJ crashes his car)
• Shit that was good!
• Man, this gets me so hot!
• CJ, you're insane, I love you!
• You're the driver ever, I love it!
• You're mad, CJ, I love it!
• That's it, CJ, push it, faster!
• Come on CJ, push it!
• Faster, you little wimp! Faster!
• I'm so hot right now!
• Oh baby, the car could blow up at the moment! (when car is on fire)
• I love it, we're on fire!
• Oh Carl, I hurt, but I love it!
• So close to death yet so alive...
• Use your eyes!
• How rude! 
• Hey!
• Watch yourself! (bumped into)
• Wake up!
• Hey, look where you're going!

Other

Biker

• You think I'm bad at knitting?!
• Careful asshole!
• Here I come! Ready or not!
• Is that coff designer ink?
• City tattoo artists are gettin' good!
• I'm coming after you jerkoff!
• Nobody touches my bike!
• Oil cans make good flower pots.
• What're you doing out here?
• Eat my leather!
• Hope you like the taste of black leather!
• Violence isn't the answer man.
• YOU GODDAMN PIECE OF SHIT!!!
• I'm gonna find you!
• That was a price for my old lady!
• Forget it, no way man.
• Hello, little lady.
• Howdy partner!
• Adiós, amigo!
• You like the tits on those Ventruas waitresses?
• Burger Shot was made from roadkill.

Los Santos taxi driver

• Why did I take this route?!
• Green means "go"!
• You're on with this car crash bullshit!
• I got a nephew with LSPD.
• Gun rhymes with run! You see? That's why I don't stop you little thugs!
• I'm so sick of these Los Santos gang wars and it's so easy they turned it so bad.
• These honks be honking in praise, you know?
• Watch the road!
• I just bought this taxi!!
• I just collected a lot of sprunk cans for this car!
• I'm pressing charges!
• I'm gonna put my shoe up your poop shoot!
• No liquor thanks, I'm on duty.
• Sprunk on the rocks.
• Gotta go! Gotta go! I don't feel too bulletproof! And then they go bangin' again!
• Oh no! This is where I get off! Boy, this is not the wild west!
• I feel shame for your mother!
• HELP!! LSPD!! You demon bastard! My cab!
• You revived me? Those gangbangers do this?! What the hell is going on here?
• Get ready for an ass whoopin'!
• You think this is a parade!
• You blew your chance for friendship.
• Bangers and jackers! The future of Los Santos!
• I don't bang son, relax.
• Mouth to mouth? Hey, don't look at me.
• You got a glass jaw, baby gangsta!
• Papa don't take no jive!
• Come here, I wanna tell ya somethin'!
• Gettin' served by an old man!
• Turn the other cheek, boy!
• The bones are brittle but the jab is stiff!
• Knockin' you out and crackin' a Sprunk!

Specific pedestrian (not appearing normally)

This pedestrian appears in an Flat-top haircut with goatee, wearing a light blue hoodie, a pair of ivory pants and black low-tops. They won't appear on streets in normal occasions. He may also comment on Carl himself, but some strategies must be used to do so.

• Come on, man, move!
• Move, homie!
• Ahh, this fool!...
• Raise up dude!
• Damn you ruin my ride!
• Make it a step!
• Ah, man...
• Hey, chill out, homie! (when bumped into)
• Easy, partner, watch out! (when bumped into)
• Watch out fool! (when bumped into)

Comprehensive Conversations

This article or section is currently Under Construction.

The following content may be incomplete and/or not verified.

This includes every possible dialogue from a conversion envolving two pedestrians. Their dialogues won't appear as texts in the brief so it would be difficult to identify.

• Man: Whassup?
• Woman: Hello!
• Man: You try that <?> Cluckin' Bell yet?
• Woman: No, not me.
• Man: Later!
• Woman: Bye-bye!

• Man: Hey baby, you don't remember me, do you?
• Woman: Hey man.
• Man: I've some smoke weed from San Fierro.
• Woman: No way, you gick!
• Man: I've gotta bail in a minute.
• Woman: Don't stay away two are!

• Man #1: How was it?
• Man #2: Hello my friend!
• Man #1: Try Las Venturas Limination Service?
• Man #2: It is terrible, it breaks my heart!
• Man #1: Have a good one, OK!
• Man #2: It is good to see you, amigo!