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A thieving opportunist has stolen a van of my latest publication hot off the press! But that SPANKED-up idiot has left the rear doors open and now my beautifully produced, tastefully photographed adult literature is being dropped all over Liberty! Take the van and follow that trail of Donkey Does Dallas volumes 1, 2 and 3 collecting it as you go. When you've followed the trail to that thieving SPANK-head, waste him! Then deliver my donkey derby to XXX Mags in the Red Light District.
El Burro

Big'n'Veiny is the final mission in Grand Theft Auto III given to protagonist Claude by Diablos leader El Burro from a payphone in the Hepburn Heights area of Portland, Liberty City.

Description

Claude goes to the payphone in Hepburn Heights, which is ringing. El Burro instructs Claude to follow a SPANKED-up thief who has stolen the latest copy of Donkey Does Dallas and collect the copies as they fly out of the back of a van. After collecting all the magazines, Claude kills the thief and then returns the magazines to XXXMags in the Red Light District.

Mission Objectives

In order to complete the mission the player must:

  • Get in the van
  • Collect the copies of the magazine and follow the trail to the thief
  • Whack the thief
  • Take the van to the back of XXX Mags

Reward

The reward for completion of the mission is $20,000 with a bonus of $10,000 if the player collects all copies of the magazines. A stack of pornographic magazines will appear at the Portland Safehouse after the mission.

El Burro's first mission Turismo becomes a re-playable mission that can be started from the payphone.

Transcript

Transcript
Claude answers the payphone in Hepburn Heights.
El Burro
(Voice only):
A thieving opportunist has stolen a van of my latest publication hot off the press, but that SPANKED-up idiot has left the rear doors open and now my beautifully produced, tastefully photographed adult literature is being dropped all over Liberty! Take the van and follow that trail of Donkey Does Dallas volumes 1, 2 and 3 collecting it as you go. When you've followed the trail to that thieving SPANK-head, waste him! Then deliver my donkey derby to XXX Mags in the Red Light District.
Claude gets into a nearby Rumpo and begins collecting the Donkey Does Dallas magazines scattered throughout Portland.
Police Dispatch: All units be on lookout for donkey porn being dropped in the Portland area.
Claude follows the trail of the magazines until it leads him to the SPANK-ed up thief in Portland Harbor. Claude kills the thief and takes the magazines to XXXMags in the Red Light District.

Walkthrough

Video Walkthroughs

Gallery

Trivia

  • The mission name may be a reference to an erect penis.
  • El Burro mentioned that Donkey Does Dallas magazines are flying off the back of the van, but they are actually Muff and the Mule magazines.
  • Somewhere along the Head Radio Building, while collecting magazines, a police radio will report "donkey porn being dropped along the Portland area."
  • In the original version of the game the player has an initial time limit of 25 seconds. This is extended to 45 seconds in the mobile version.
  • At the end of the mission, some rare pedestrians will appear near XXXMags, these pedestrians never appear on the streets. This can be seen here. They were replaced by pimps on the mobile version.

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