Cluckin' Bell

"A global chain of fast food restaurants specializing in deep-fried, chicken-flavored slabs of salt and fat."

- Description at LCN.com.

Cluckin' Bell is a fast food restaurant chain specializing in chicken-based food products that appears across the Grand Theft Auto series. The player can buy stocks from them in the Lcn-exchange.com website in Grand Theft Auto V.

Description
Cluckin' Bell is most likely based on Taco Bell and KFC. Taco Bell uses a bell logo, KFC serves fried chicken, and both companies are owned by the same parent corporation. It is possible that Cluckin' Bell could also be based on Popeyes, because of the color scheme. The name may come from a quote from the episode "Goodbyeee" of British comedy series Blackadder Goes Forth, which contains the line "I think the phrase rhymes with clucking bell", a censored form of the phrase fucking hell. The franchise is probably inspired by Cluck-U Chicken, as both names are minced oaths. Elements of the chain seem to be a parody of Chick-fil-A, including the employee dressed as a chicken (possibly a reference to Chick-fil-A's cows), some of the slogans used by the company, and the chicken sandwiches that the company sells in GTA IV.

It was likely founded by Charles K. Bell, seeing as he is mentioned as the "King of the Cock" when being advertised as a special guest judge on the Annual Paleto Poultry Pageant.

Cluckin' Bell employees are often depicted as disgruntled workers, uttering spiteful lines such as “If you come back, you’re a moron” or “I hope you choke-a-doodle-doo!”

GTA San Andreas — GTA Liberty City Stories
In the 3D Universe's continuity, Cluckin' Bell was established in 1982. In 1992 (the setting of GTA San Andreas) the company ran two advertisements on local media. The first commercial states that Cluckin' Bell breed chickens with "Six wings, forty breasts" before quickly gassing them to death. Their stock prices fell when they denied using factory farms, although the song suggests that their stock price has risen again. The second is a dig at animal rights protesters, and suggests that Cluckin' Bell previously served rats along with the chicken but is no longer doing so. It also implies that they use chemicals which result in breast swelling in humans.



In 1994, Cluckin' Bell was taken to court in Ohio, winning the case after no link could be found between Cluckin' Bell meals and mammary gland swelling. The Cluckin' Bell website also says that the company takes no responsibility for erectile dysfunction, hair loss, heart disease, brain shrinkage, obesity, stomach ulcers, blindness or teenage acne. The website also documents how a "recent" case against the company ended after the judge in Mexico City was killed.

Cluckin' Bell sponsors the Beat The Cock Challenge, two triathlons in GTA San Andreas which take place at Santa Maria Beach, Los Santos and Palomino Creek Beach, Red County. Posters for the challenge are located at various points around San Andreas, including the Cobra Marital Arts Gym.

In GTA Liberty City Stories, a billboard advertises Cluckin' Bell's "Fowl Wrap" which sells for 99 cents; however, there are no Cluckin' Bell restaurants in-game.

Menu
Cluckin' Bell, like other fast food outlets in GTA San Andreas, offer the player four meals, each with different quantities of fat, with the Salad Meal being the only fat-free option. In Las Venturas, the pricing of the Cluckin' Big Meal, Cluckin' Huge Meal and Salad Meal are 20% higher than in the rest of the state, as noted below:

Dialogue
Serving Rob place
 * 1) Cock-a-doodle-doo, what do you want?
 * 2) It's all processed chicken ass.
 * 3) Clucketty-fuck, place your order.
 * 4) Well, hello-a-doodle-do!
 * 5) Cluck, cluck, how can I serve you?
 * 6) Cock-a-cluckle-doo, please place an order.
 * 7) Cock-a-doodle-cluck. Welcome.
 * 8) How may I further degrade myself, sir?
 * 9) Yummy-doodle-do, how may I serve you?
 * 1) I ain't serving you!
 * 2) We're closed.
 * 3) Get outta here, you're embarrassing yourself!
 * 4) Do yourself a favor pal, I ain't serving.
 * 5) Take it out on me, why don't ya?
 * 6) Bother some other poor bastard, please!
 * 7) Just fuck off!
 * 8) Well, that's just fuck-a-doodle dandy!
 * 9) Cluckin' bastard!

Throwing up after eating too much food
 * 1) You want more?! Get outta here!
 * 2) What is it with you? Scram!
 * Wow, did you throw up your brain too?
 * 1) Believe me, you've got better shit to do!
 * 2) Get outta here!
 * 3) Cluckin' hell!
 * 4) That's it, sir, work that diaphragm!
 * 5) Must be the disinfectant!
 * 6) We got another one!

Purchasing food Not having enough money
 * 1) Don't choke on the bone fragments.
 * 2) You might be lucky enough to find a feather.
 * 3) The chewy bits aren't harmful, sir.
 * 4) Only ten percent guano!
 * 5) Enjoy-a-doodle-doo!
 * 6) Clucketty-cluck-cluck, sir.
 * 7) If you come back, you're a moron.
 * 8) Hope you choke-a-doodle-doo!
 * 1) Get outta here!
 * 2) Believe me, you've got better shit to do!

Theme song
In GTA San Andreas, the company's two theme songs featured in their somewhat odd radio advertisements, and their website, are below.

Note: The website song is a bit modified, missing the: Cluckin' Bell: If you enjoyed it, the chicken didn't die in vain! part.

Grand Theft Auto IV — Chinatown Wars
Cluckin' Bell is reintroduced in GTA IV as a place for the player to regain health by eating food. However, the player can only buy a fowl burger for $1 (which sounds like a burger is disgusting, though fowl spelled this way simply means "bird") which will fully restore the player's health. Cluckin' Bell also advertises a new non-interactive product, the Stuffed Pollo Todo Frito (literally Fried Chicken Stuffed with Everything), which is a whole deep fried chicken stuffed with mashed potatoes, gravy and corn, a parody of KFC's "Famous Bowl (or Chicken Bowl outside the United States)".

As with GTA IV and EFLC's Burger Shot locations, two possible employees will serve the player behind the counter, either an Eastern European woman or an African-American man. More employees can be seen using the appliances in the kitchen behind the counter.

Also in GTA IV, the player can download a Cluckin' Bell theme for their upgraded phone via the website www.vipluxuryringtones.com. Cluckin' Bell is also a favourite eating spot for Little Jacob and Dwayne Forge. Other additions include certain Benson trucks that feature Cluckin' Bell's signage, as well as an interesting addition of accessible toilets in Cluckin' Bell outlets separated for both men and women (labelled "Cocks" and "Chicks" respectively).

Cluckin' Bell in GTA Chinatown Wars is even less significant, appearing only as a non-interactive and inaccessible part of the cityscape. Yankee trucks in the game may also bear Cluckin' Bell liveries, appearing in yellow and bearing the Cluckin' Bell logo on its sides.

Mascot
Inside of every Restaurant are 4 Cluck Norris Figures, each inside a glass cabinet. One is on the left of the entrance. The second hangs on the left of the counter. Third is placed at the right wall of the elevated platform. The last one hangs on the right wall of the main refectory.

Grand Theft Auto V
Cluckin' Bell is also featured in Grand Theft Auto V but their restaurants are no longer accessible. Cluckin' Bell has a factory, farm and warehouses in Paleto Bay named "Clucking Bell Farms". Their small drive-thru vendor in Strawberry is nicknamed "The Coop". Their trucks can be seen coming and going frequently. The player accesses this warehouse during the mission The Paleto Score. Its main stock competitor is Taco Bomb, while its other competitors stand as Burger Shot, Pizza This... and Up-n-Atom Burger.

In the aftermath of The Paleto Score, due to the shootout inside its local plant and the destruction of the surrounding area, Cluckin' Bell stocks will plummet by approximately 39.99% upon completion of this mission. This stock will remain at its depressed value until completion of The Third Way, where it will shoot up by approximately 66.89%. But be warned - Cluckin' Bell's falling stock price does not result in a reciprocal boost to that of its competitor, Taco Bomb.

Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Like other fast-food outlets in GTA San Andreas, Cluckin' Bell is present in all major cities in San Andreas. Within rural San Andreas, the chain has only one outlet within town limits (Angel Pine), and two outlets at intersections outside Tierra Robada and Fort Carson. Although the mission Drive-Thru has Carl use the drive-thru at the Willowfield branch, most other times it can only be accessed through the front door. All locations feature a cashier who is openly hateful of his customers, often berating them for even buying food there ("If you come back, you're a moron."). There is a Cluckin' Bell outlet in Market, Los Santos, which is unmarked on the map in the original PS2 version.

Grand Theft Auto IV
Unlike Cluckin' Bell in GTA San Andreas and its indirect competition in GTA IV, Burger Shot, which operates 10 outlets, Cluckin' Bell's presence in the game is far more limited, with only four outlets [two accessible] throughout Liberty City and Alderney State: in Cerveza Heights, Northwood (closed) and The Triangle. Alderney has only one outlet, in Berchem (inaccessible).

Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars
While GTA Chinatown Wars features the same outlets existing at the same locations in Dukes and Algonquin, the Berchem outlet is absent as Alderney is not included in the game's setting.

Grand Theft Auto V
Cluckin' Bell operates three outlets in Los Santos, and none of them is accessible to the player.

Easter Eggs
The highest price meals in Cluckin' Bell restaurants is "Little Clucker" ($8.00) and "Little Peckers" ($8.00), both of them are a meal for kids.
 * The most expensive kids meal

The Cluckin' Bell new "Veggie Wings" with a row of disclaimer below: "may contain meat".
 * Veggie Wings may contain meat

On the paper-towel dispenser in Cluckin' Bell restaurants with the text of "Clean Hands, Clean Conscience".
 * Clean Hands, Clean Conscience

On the cash register of Cluckin' Bell restaurants, you can see the text on it like: "Holy Shit", "Veg Crap", "Medium, Extra Medium, Medium XL", "Ask CJ", "Launch Missiles", "Space Lazer" etc.
 * Cash register in Cluckin' Bell

In Cluckin' Bell restaurants, near the back of the store, there's an action figure of a man in a martial arts position wearing a chicken hat; printed on the glass is "Cluck Norris", a reference to film/television star and martial artist Chuck Norris.
 * Cluck Norris in Cluckin' Bell

In Cluckin' Bell, the slogan of "The Mighty Cluck" is "200% bigger breasts", referring to the rumor that the KFC's chickens get pumped with too much hormones.
 * Double your breasts

Another thing in Cluckin' Bell is the names above the restrooms. The male restroom says "Cocks" above it and the female restroom says "Chicks" above it.
 * Cluckin' Bell's restrooms

There is a sign of "No chickens are choked when preparing our food (That's a promise)" in the Cluckin' Bell. "Choke the chicken" is slang for masturbation.
 * No chickens are choked

Meals at Cluckin' Bell prefer to use the word "cock" instead of "chicken".
 * Cluckin' Bell's cock

General

 * The sign in the trailer reads "Going Cheep", referring to "Going Cheap" and the noise a bird makes.
 * Cluckin' Bell had a website on the real-life internet at http://CluckinBellHappyChicken.com, designed in HTML 2.0 style but running on Flash. The site displayed the menu and advertising from Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas. After the end of support for Flash, the website was taken offline on 12 December 2020 and redirected to the Rockstar Games main page.

Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas

 * At the Cluckin' Bell drive-thru restaurant, there are posters for the "cluckin' little kids' meal" and the "cluckin' huge meal", and the price "$1.99" written on both posters. However, the actual menu item for "cluckin' huge meal" costs $10 rather than $1.99. One can infer that the kids' meal also costs the exact same as a huge meal.
 * In certain Cluckin' Bell restaurants, cups with the Burger Shot logo can be seen on cup dispensers. The word Burger Shot can also be seen on the screen of the counter, meaning the same model from the Burger Shot restaurants was used.
 * The back of the employee's shirt has writing that reads: "Taste the cock", a deliberate reference to oral sex.
 * In a beta screenshot, the employee is seen to be much fatter and dons a much-too-tight shirt.
 * In GTA San Andreas, Radio X DJ Sage comments about how she "did a guy" behind Cluckin' Bell during the intro to Primal Scream's "Movin' on Up".
 * Cluckin' Bell is the only fast-food restaurant where it is not possible to access the kitchen by using the door in the back.
 * In the mission "Drive-Thru", Carl, Sweet, Ryder and Big Smoke receive Burger Shot boxes instead of Cluckin' Bell boxes.
 * The employee in the store is voiced by Joe Lo Truglio, who later voiced Vincenzo Cilli in GTA Liberty City Stories.
 * In the Definitive Edition of the game, the employees have a nametag which says "wmybell" on it. This is the character's model name within the game files - White Male Young cluckin' Bell.

Grand Theft Auto IV

 * The music heard in Cluckin' Bell outlets comes from Liberty Rock Radio in The Triangle and Radio Broker in Cerveza Heights.
 * Cluckin' Bell is Little Jacob and Dwayne Forge's favorite place to eat.
 * In GTA IV, the African-American man behind the counter might tell Niko something like: "I wouldn't eat it, but... here you go!". A Burger Shot employee might also say the same thing when serving the player.
 * Like with Burger Shot employees, if the player is unruly, the cashier will cross their arms and refuse to serve the player.
 * The closed down Cluckin' Bell outlet in Algonquin is probably a reference to an infamous KFC/Taco Bell location in Manhattan which suffered a serious rodent infestation in early 2007.

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