User blog comment:JoePlay/Episodes from Liberty City Giveaway/@comment-3217838-20101118180256

GetaLife has been providing insurance for over a hundred thirty-five years. And we'll be with you all the years of your life. Or for the next ten seconds if your chute fails to open in time.

Life is full of uncertainty.

Even if that chute opens, you might drift back into the side of the Rotterdam Tower. Or get ran over by an an angry non-english speaking dirty immigrant driving a yellow cab upon landing in the street. Or be shot by a cop for looking suspicious (read, Dominican). Or be caught in a crossfire between mobsters in Hove Beach. You could choke on your next Bleeder at Burger Shot. The possibilities for death and dismemberment in Liberty City are endless.

But with GetaLife, you have the peace of mind and security of knowing that when your pistol runs empty and you find yourself slaughtered by vengeful NOOSE Agents, your family will be taken care of in a life of prosperity, and happiness. If they can get a judge to force us to pay out on the policy. Your brother can stop slinging dope, your sister can quit her crap human resources job and your mother can stop taking money form loan sharks, and they can all move into a big mansion in Westdyke.

So trust GetaLife. Because you're worth more to your loved ones dead than alive. And that's peace of mind. Guaranteed.